By S X Meagher

Chapter 15

Seven a.m. Saturday found Jamie and Ryan packing up their bikes in Conor's truck for the trip to Fort Mason. They had checked and double-checked that they had all of the necessary papers and forms, and when they were confident that all was in order, they took off.

Jamie was once again thankful that Ryan had done the ride so many times. She knew all of the shortcuts and all of the little tricks that would make the experience more enjoyable. Today, for instance, she parked a good half-mile away from the Pavilion at Fort Mason. Since they had their bikes, it was just a five-minute ride to their destination, with none of the attendant traffic.

The Pavilion was fully staffed with volunteers, but the riders were just starting to trickle in. Day Zero was the last day to complete all the required paperwork, attend a safety class, and drop off bikes. Ryan was pleased to learn that the first safety meeting would be held at eight a.m. They walked their bikes to the designated area and waited for the class to begin.

This experience was pro forma for Ryan, who had attended five of them, but Jamie paid such rapt attention that Ryan actually had to laugh at her. The main theme of the meeting was the inherent danger of the ride. They would be using heavily traveled highways and roads that would remain open to vehicular traffic. The riders received tips on how to safely cross the narrow bridges-some barely wide enough to accommodate two trucks-that were on their route.

After the meeting, they zoomed back to the Pavilion to pick up their packets, and found the hall pass that enabled them to go directly to registration. Once there, they picked up their registration materials and went directly to the tent assignment station. The line was still quite short, and they were processed in just a few minutes. Next they took their bikes over to the parking area. They affixed their numbers to the frames and handed them over to the very friendly volunteers.

Next stop was the merchandise area. Jamie bought a long sleeved t-shirt in each of the colors available. "I want to sleep in these all year to remind me of how we got to know each other," she said sweetly when Ryan expressed surprise at her purchases. Ryan had to buy a tiny little t-shirt in bright yellow for Caitlin, but that was her only purchase.

As they started to walk away from the merchandise area, Ryan spotted her partner trying to stuff another couple of items in her backpack. "What'cha got there?" she asked, knowing Jamie's tendencies all too well.

"Never you mind, Sweet Cheeks," she replied airily.

It was now only ten a.m., and they were finished. They walked around for a while just checking out all the people, but after a bit Ryan casually remarked, "Do you know what I would really love to do today?"

Jamie pursed her lips in thought. She looked up at the sky as if seeking the answer and finally replied, "Whatever it is, I bet it involves another blonde."

"You already know me too well," Ryan replied. "You're my favorite blonde, but Caitlin is a close second," she teased.

"Here's my phone, call and see if her busy schedule will permit a visit."

Their young playmate was indeed available. Tommy was at home alone with her, and he willingly relinquished possession of his daughter. They arrived at around eleven and whisked the giggling baby away moments later.

When they returned to the house, they decided to just stay close to home. They needed to pack and take care of any last-minute details and, even though Caitlin couldn't help, she was certainly entertaining. When they got into the house, Conor immediately snatched the baby away, tossing her in the air and carrying her all over the house as he sang one of her favorite songs. The girls took the opportunity to head downstairs and start to get organized.

Ryan had stressed the importance of taking as little as possible with them. Although their belongings would be carried for them, they still had to fetch them from the trucks each night and return them in the morning. Ryan warned that sometimes the truck was a very long ways away. They decided to take four day's worth of biking gear. They each brought one pair of padded ankle length pants. Jamie brought three pairs of knee-length padded shorts and four quick-drying jerseys, one long-sleeved and three short. Ryan wore padded cotton under shorts, so she brought three pairs of those and just two pairs of unlined bike shorts. She also carried four jerseys, one long-sleeved, two short and her new sleeveless jersey. Next came their thin sleeveless gore-tex vests and lightweight nylon shells. They each added a few pairs of underwear and four sports bras. They had purchased some new quick-drying thin socks, and these were added to the pile. Ryan had suggested that Jamie bring a swimsuit for the beach in Los Angeles, which she dutifully did.

They also needed some regular clothes for the time spent hanging around off the bikes. The weather was very unpredictable, so they each brought their fleece jacket and a pair of heavy sweats. Ryan packed two pairs of her baggy nylon shorts and a couple of tank tops. She added two t-shirts and a pair of Teva sandals, and she was set. Jamie had a harder time deciding, but she finally settled on a couple of pairs of shorts and four t-shirts. She agreed that the Teva sandals were a good choice, so she added hers to the pile. She packed an additional extra-large t-shirt to sleep in. She asked Ryan suspiciously, "What do you have to sleep in?"

"This is my last week wearing my underwear to bed," she intoned solemnly. "After this week, it's all nude all the time," she teased as she grabbed Jamie for a vigorous bout of tickling.

They decided to pack most things in heavy-duty trash bags first to insure that they wouldn't get wet. "I don't know how it happens, but the first two years, half of my clothes were wet when I put them on," Ryan said. "Nothing feels worse than clammy nylon on a cold morning."

Ryan had a checklist from previous years that she amended as needed. They carefully ticked off additional items one by one until she was satisfied that they would have everything they required. Finally they got out their gear bags and began to load them up. Jamie had a ton of experience in packing for long trips, and she even gave Ryan a few pointers. They were finished packing by the time Conor brought the sleeping baby downstairs. "Do you guys want some lunch? I was going to go down to the Italian deli to get a combo; how about you?"

"I'm in!" Ryan replied immediately.

"What's a combo?" Jamie asked.

Ryan slid her arms around her friend as she said to Conor, "She's been all around the world, but the poor little thing has never had a combo." They both shook their heads sadly.

"We'll remedy that oversight right now," Conor said as he handed her the baby. "I'll be back in half an hour."

With Ryan's help, Jamie sat back against the headboard with Caitlin nestled into her chest. Ryan lay down on her side, facing Jamie. She patted the soft little terry cloth covered back as she slowly said, "Lucky, lucky baby," while casting a sly smile up at Jamie.

"You're not treated so badly either, Ryan," she chided as she pushed her dark head down onto her lap. She stroked the raven locks as Ryan closed her eyes and let the contentment just seep into her. Seconds later Ryan joined her cousin in sleep.

Conor stopped abruptly in the doorway as he caught sight of the happy little group. "Should I come back later?" he asked in a whisper. Jamie just smiled and shook her head. "The big one will be up in a second, and the little one won't hear a thing," she said knowledgeably. As predicted, Ryan stirred as soon as she heard voices. She gazed up at Jamie with a look of pure love on her face, sat up and gave her a very tender, heart-felt kiss. Jamie looked a little surprised as she said quietly, "Conor's here."

Ryan turned around and caught sight of her somewhat embarrassed brother. "Get used to it, Conor, you're gonna see a lot of smooching around here from now on," she predicted.

Conor had brought plates, knives, napkins and sodas as well as the promised sandwiches. Ryan removed the wrappings from both of their combos as Jamie supervised. "You're dripping on your desk," she observed.

"It's worth it," Ryan replied. As she brought the huge tomato sauce-covered sandwich up to Jamie's mouth, she instructed, "Bite." Jamie did so and seconds later a pleasure-suffused smile covered her face. "Meatball and sausage together?" she asked with her mouth still half full.

"Don't forget the mozzarella," Ryan chided her as she took a big bite herself. They alternated bites of the same sandwich until Ryan popped the last bite into her partner's mouth. She then started on the second sandwich, very pleased when Jamie declined any more.

"I finally figured it out," Conor said with satisfaction as he watched Ryan eat.

"What's that?" Jamie asked.

"I figured out why Ryan's a lesbian," he said proudly.

"This I gotta hear," Ryan laughed.

"It's a clever ploy to get more than half of any meal. If you were with a guy, he'd want some of your food, just like you do with Jamie," he replied with a big smile.

"Okay, wise guy. That explains me, but why is Jamie gay?"

He looked perplexed, as he answered. "That one I'll never figure out," he said sadly. "But she clearly is, because if she was straight she could have had me!" he laughed as he successfully ducked a quick backhand from his sister.

Caitlin woke up shortly after lunch was finished. She was all hot and sweaty from her nap, and she cried and fussed as they quickly changed her diaper. Conor got up to fetch a bottle and warm it, as Jamie tried to calm her down. She stood up and bounced her on her hip, talking soothingly into her little pink ear. Ryan just watched with pleasure as she slowly quieted and began to play with Jamie's face with her tiny little hands. She was trying to insert her fist into Jamie's mouth when Conor returned. He gently removed her from Jamie's grasp and lay her back in his strong arm as he fed her the bottle. Caitlin crossed her little feet as she rested her head against Conor's chest and sucked lustily.

"You do have a way with women," Jamie observed as Caitlin gazed up at him adoringly.

Around five o'clock Ryan called Tommy to see when he wanted the baby back. "Oh, don't bother, Ryan. Annie can stop by on her way home from work. She can be there by 6. Is that okay?"

Ryan agreed, and she and Jamie took her out for a little walk. Rather, Jamie had a little walk. Ryan strapped Caitlin into her three-wheeled jogger stroller and ran up and down the hills of the Noe Valley with maniacal glee. As they passed her again and again, Jamie heard the wild giggles of the baby and the equally wild laughter of her partner. After a half-hour, Ryan was more winded than Jamie had ever seen her. She was forced to bend over at the waist for a long while, trying to suck air into her lungs. Jamie put a hand on her back and grasped the stroller with her other hand. Ryan was covered in sweat, and the heat radiated off her in waves. Caitlin was ready for more as she bounced in her seat trying to scoot the stroller forward.

Ryan finally stood up and raised her hands in surrender. "That's it, Caitlin. The express train is through for the day. We're taking the local from now on." She took the stroller handle from Jamie and started to walk down the hill in a more sedate fashion. Caitlin would have none of it. She continued to thrust herself forward, craving speed. Her little grunts turned to whines as she demanded that her needs be recognized. Ryan finally rolled her eyes and took off again. "You're turning her into a thrill seeker, just like you!" Jamie warned as they flew by once again.

After another fifteen minutes of frantic activity, they arrived back at the house. Ryan was surprised to see her Aunt Maeve's car as well as Tommy's. Jamie carried the baby as they entered the house, where they were all surprised to see Maeve, Tommy, Annie and Kevin. "Surprise!" they all yelled. Conor, Brendan and Martin all came out of the kitchen to join in the greeting.

Jamie looked at Ryan in puzzlement. Martin finally spoke up, "It's a send-off party for you two. We wanted to make sure you had a good meal before you start." After he got a better look at Ryan he asked in alarm, "What have you been doing, Siobhán?"

She did look a sight. Her face was a deep pink, her bangs were plastered against her forehead and her marine blue t-shirt was drenched with sweat. All eyes turned to Jamie, who looked like she had just been sitting in a chair. Ryan finally piped up, "Caitlin and I were doing wind sprints on the hills. She's obviously in better shape than I am, because she's as cool as a cucumber," she teased as she pinched her little pink cheek.

"You go take a shower, young lady, or you'll catch your death," he ordered.

Ryan happily nodded and went downstairs. Jamie entertained questions about their training and her nerves until Ryan returned, looking much refreshed. She wore a navy blue polo and a pair of khakis along with a well-worn pair of penny loafers. As soon as she entered the room she snatched the baby from Jamie and put her on her shoulders for a quick little horsy ride.

"You know, Ryan, you get her used to a level of activity that none of the rest of us can duplicate," Annie chided her.

"That's all part of my evil plan," she agreed. "She needs to come to me for her adrenaline rush," she said as she took off even faster around the house spurred on by Caitlin's giggles.

"Has she always been like that?" Jamie asked Martin incredulously.

"From the day of her birth," he admitted. "We were lulled into complacency by Brendan here. He was a perfectly lovely little baby, content to be cuddled and carried and cooed to. Then Conor came along and we thought we would lose our minds," he said as he shook his head. "He was in constant motion, every minute. Rory made us think that Conor was just a fluke. He was so much like Brendan, so calm and peaceful." He smiled at the memory. "Then we finally got our little girl. I assumed she would sit on the front porch in a little white dress playing with her dolls," he sighed heavily. "But I swear she was twice as bad as Conor ever was. She never showed fear of anything in her life, Jamie. I used to take her to the station when she was just Caitlin's age. All the guys would take turns sliding down the pole with her just laughing her head off. They'd all be tired, and she'd be begging for more."

They all shared a few more memories of the young Ryan, causing Jamie to smile broadly at her from across the room. Ryan came and stood next to her, putting an arm around her shoulders. Jamie leaned over and quietly whispered, "We're going to adopt. I can't take the risk that your energy level could be genetic."

Ryan just laughed as she gave her a little squeeze.

Conor had picked up some delicious homemade pasta sauce at the deli that afternoon as well as some fabulous crusty Italian bread. Dinner was pasta with meat sauce, a big green salad and the bread. As usual, Ryan cleaned Jamie's plate after she was finished with her own. "Do you do that in restaurants?" Conor asked out of curiosity.

"Yep," Ryan replied happily.

"Not always," Jamie corrected. "When we had lunch with my grandfather not only did she not eat off of my plate, she also carried on a lucid conversation. And she didn't once close her eyes and moan like she usually does when she eats something really tasty."

That brought a laugh from everyone, as Martin said, "I'm glad you can put on manners when you're out in public, Darlin'."

"Thanks, I think," she replied slowly.

Before all of the guests left, Jamie saw Ryan huddled in the corner with her aunt. She had a serious expression on her face, and she was nodding intently. After a minute, Maeve patted her on the cheek and leaned up to kiss her. Ryan reminded them all of the spot where they would meet, and everyone promised to be at The Fort the next day to see them off.

It was almost nine by the time everyone was gone and the kitchen was properly cleaned. Jamie had taken on Rory's tasks in his absence, and she found that within a day or two her little jobs seemed like they had been hers for years. As they made their way downstairs, Jamie heard her cell phone ringing from its resting place in her purse. She extracted it and hit the talk button on the fourth ring. "Hello," she said a little breathlessly.

"Hi, Jamie," responded the deep voice on the other end.

"Jack!" she said with surprise. "How are you?"

"I'm fine. Is this a good time to talk?"

"Um...sure, Jack. What do you want to talk about?" She made eye contact with Ryan, who went back upstairs to give her some privacy.

"Are you at home? I could call you on that line if you'd rather."

"No, I'm not at home. Let me call you right back," she said. He quickly agreed.

She took several deep breaths as she sat down on the bed and dialed the still-memorized number. He picked up on the first ring. "Are you at Ryan's?" he asked tentatively.

"Yes, I am," she replied, no longer concerned with his reaction.

"Are you living with her?" he asked quietly.

"Just this week, to get ready for the ride. I couldn't stand to be around Cassie another minute, so I came over here," she replied, knowing that wasn't his real question.

"Yeah, Cassie called me a few weeks ago," he admitted. "Ever since then I've been wanting to call you, but I've been kind of afraid to."

"What did she say?" Jamie asked, knowing the answer.

"The details aren't important," he said graciously. "But the bottom line was that you were with Ryan now." After a quiet pause he asked, "Is that true?"

"Jack, I'm happy to talk about my life with you, but I hope that you'll keep anything I tell you in confidence," she said after a moment's hesitation.

There was total silence for a long minute, then he said sadly, "I'm sorry you think you have to ask that, Jamie."

She sighed heavily as she acknowledged her paranoia. "I'm sorry, Jack. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. It's just that I'm going through kind of a difficult time, and people who I thought were friends have betrayed me. But you're right, I never should have assumed that you would hurt me."

"I never would, Jamie," he said quietly.

"I'm sorry, Jack. I would give anything to have avoided hurting you. I swear that as soon as I started to get a handle on my feelings, I was honest with you." She paused to gather her courage. "The answer to your question is that I am with Ryan now. And I hope I always will be," she said firmly.

"Are you happy with your choice?" he asked after a short, uncomfortable silence.

"You know...I feel like I'm beginning to be completely comfortable with myself for the first time in my life, Jack," she replied. "I'm just so sorry that I didn't know myself better before I met you. It would have saved us both a lot of pain."

"Did you know when we were together?" he asked a bit hesitantly.

"I didn't have a clue in my conscious mind, Jack. I must have had some pretty big subconscious clues. I mean, I was drawn to take that class, even though I told myself it was because of the time it was offered." After a beat she added, "That's another thing I'm sorry about. You knew something was going on, but I refused to acknowledge it. If I had, I think it would have saved both of us a lot of pain."

"I just had a cold terror in my gut the night Cassie told me about that class. I think I had some suspicions even before that happened, but I was afraid to admit them to myself."

"Why do you think you were suspicious?" Jamie asked, amazed that he was admitting his own doubts.

"Well, I'm certainly not the world's greatest lover," he said with a self-effacing laugh, "but you just didn't respond to me in the way that I was used to. I kept telling myself that you were just inexperienced, but you were just not passionate for me. That never made sense to me, because you were so passionate in everything else that you did." There was another silence as he added, "I hope you find your passion with Ryan, Jamie. I really do."

She fought back the tears as she replied, "I think that's the nicest, most generous thing anyone has ever said to me. Thank you for that, Jack. You don't know how much that means to me."

"I wish it could have been me, Jamie. No matter who you're with, I want you to be happy. I truly mean that," he said sincerely.

"If I was going to be with a man, it would still be you, Jack. I hope you know how much I did love you. But I couldn't commit my life to you and not feel that physical connection that people in love need to have."

"Do you have that with Ryan?" he asked tentatively, needing to know the answer even though he feared it.

She considered telling him that the question was too personal, but she felt that he deserved the truth. "I do, Jack. I really do."

"It's funny, Jamie," he said reflectively. "After I talked to Cassie, I spent a couple of days letting her get to me. I don't want to repeat what she said, but she's under the impression that Ryan has some kind of unnatural hold over you." As Jamie tried to interrupt, he continued, "But after a few days, I let reality in and really thought about who you were. Jamie, you couldn't be talked into ordering a dinner that you didn't want. You're nobody's fool, and I don't believe that even someone as appealing as Ryan could get you to do one thing that you didn't want to do."

"Thanks for acknowledging who I really am, Jack. Not only didn't Ryan push me, I really had to convince her that this was right for me. We're both really happy now, Jack. I just hope you find someone who loves you as much as she loves me."

"I do too, Jamie. And I hope I can find someone that I love as much as I did you."

"I hope so too, Jack. More than anything," she said fervently.

"I'll let you go, Jamie. The reason I called tonight was to wish you the best of luck on your ride. I just want you to know that I'll be thinking of you every day and sending you good thoughts."

Jamie lost her battle with her emotions this time. "Thank you, Jack. That means a lot to me," she said through her tears. "Thanks so much for calling."

"Anytime, Jamie. You tell Ryan to take good care of you next week."

"I will, Jack. Bye," she said as she hung up.

At 9:30 Ryan poked her head into her room and saw Jamie lying on the bed on her back, staring up at the ceiling. She approached her gently and sat on the edge of the bed. "Are you okay?" she asked as she lightly grasped her hand.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'll tell you about it tomorrow. Now I just want to go to sleep," she said with a tired little sigh.

"Do you want me to go upstairs, and you can just stay here?"

"Okay, if you really don't mind," she replied sleepily. "I want to smell you on the sheets all night long," she said as she squeezed a pillow and was rewarded with the familiar scent.

"Sleep tight," Ryan said as she kissed her tenderly and rubbed her back. "I'll wake you up at 4:30, okay?"

"Is it just me, or does that seem a little early?" she asked as she sat up and started to strip out of her clothes.

"It is a little early, so you go to sleep quickly," Ryan ordered as she turned her head while Jamie slipped into a t-shirt.

"Would you lie down with me and hold me for a few minutes?" Jamie asked hopefully. "You always calm me down so fast."

"Of course I will," Ryan said as she climbed into bed and wrapped her in her arms. In less than five minutes, Jamie was limp and breathing rhythmically. She carefully extracted herself from the dangerously tempting spot and climbed the stairs to Rory's room.

At 4:35 a.m. Jamie felt a warm body slide into bed next to her. She scooted backwards until she was plastered up against the comforting form. "That was your last night of sleeping alone," Ryan said softly, "did you enjoy it?"

"No. I missed you all night," Jamie muttered. "I want you next to me for the rest of my life."

"That's a request that I'm only too happy to fulfill," Ryan said as she rolled her friend over and started to give her a brisk rub to get her blood moving. After a minute or so Jamie reluctantly struggled to her feet. She got into the shower while Ryan carried their bags upstairs. Fifteen minutes later, they were ready to go. They both wore the California AIDS Ride 6 official jerseys with the sponsor's logo brandished across their chests. Ryan was both pleased and slightly disapproving as Jamie handed her the jersey while they were getting dressed, but she swallowed her reticence about accepting the near-constant presents and thanked her sincerely. Martin and Conor were just finishing up their coffee as Brendan came in the front door. He gave Ryan a hug as he sleepily asked, "Could you guys take off at around nine, just once?"

Ryan laughed and hugged him back. "I know it's early, but it really means a lot to me that you come to see us off."

"You have to drag that bike 560 miles; getting up early isn't really much of a sacrifice," Brendan said, as he gave her another little squeeze.

Ryan got down on the floor to give Duffy a firm hug, "You take care of Da and Conor while I'm gone, Duff. It's gonna be just you boys all week, so try to stay out of trouble." Duffy looked up at her sadly, recognizing the signs of her departure. Jamie joined her, getting a lick on the face in the bargain.

They tossed their gear into the bed of the truck, and they all climbed in. "I'm glad I bought the crew cab," Conor said as Brendan climbed into the back with the girls.

"You know, I don't remember ever having a normal car. Did we Da?" Ryan asked.

"No, not during your lifetime," Martin said. "Your mother and I had a nice little normal Ford when we were married, but by the time you arrived, it was clear we had to switch to a bigger vehicle. We've had either a van or a truck ever since."

"Have you ever owned a car, Ryan?" Jamie inquired.

"Nope. All I've ever had were bikes. I got my first one when I was sixteen, and Da almost had a fit!"

"Yes, and I still blame you for that," Martin said as he poked Conor in the arm. "You're the one who had to start with the blasted things."

"It's not my fault that Ryan had to imitate everything that I did," Conor replied defensively. "Besides, she should thank me. I think she gets half her dates because of that bike."

"Then maybe we had better get rid of it," Jamie laughed, "because your dating days are over," she added as she squeezed a firm thigh.

"I've never given up anything so willingly," Ryan replied as she gazed down at her partner with a sweet look on her face.

Chapter 16

They arrived at Fort Mason at around 5:15. Even though Jamie usually got up early, and considered morning her favorite time of day, she had never claimed to be a morning person. Today was a perfect example of that dichotomy. What she loved about mornings were periods of quiet contemplation while watching the sunrise or writing in her journal, but the scene that greeted them when they disembarked from the truck did not in any way remind her of the thing she most liked in the morning-stillness. She was completely unprepared for the overwhelming number of riders, bikes, families, volunteers, news trucks, police officers, and spectators that greeted them. The noise level and general anxiety that flowed from the crowd was actually a little overpowering for the inexperienced woman, and she found herself gripping Ryan's hand much harder than normal.

"Nervous?" a calm voice whispered in her ear.

She managed a quick nod, a little embarrassed that such was the case.

"It is a big deal, Jamie," she assured her. "We've worked really hard to be able to do this and it's only natural that you have butterflies in your tummy." Looking around she added, "It is pretty overpowering, isn't it?"

"I was in St. Peter's Square in Rome on Easter morning once," she replied thoughtfully, feeling a little better since Ryan agreed that her anxiety was expected, "but this is a close second."

They finally found the gear drop off point. After they checked that the bags were properly tagged, they went to their designated meeting place to say hello to the rest of the family. Maeve and Kevin were already there, but Tommy had yet to arrive. "Do you think you can eat yet?" Ryan asked Jamie solicitously. "I know you don't like to eat very early, but you have to today."

"Yeah, I could get some cereal down," she agreed. "Let's go get some now, so we can watch the opening ceremonies with everyone." They found the breakfast line and settled on oatmeal, bananas and raisins. Jamie agreed to forego coffee and settled for apple juice. Ryan added two bagels and some cream cheese to her selections. They sat at a long table, chatting with the other riders. Ryan knew a lot of the participants, and her meal was continually interrupted by people stopping by to greet her.

"Do you know most of these people from before the ride?" Jamie asked when they had a minute alone.

"No. I met them all on one of the previous rides," she replied.

"I can't believe how you can remember all of their names," Jamie marveled. "How do you do that?"

Ryan looked thoughtful for a few minutes. While she thought, Jamie mused about how she loved the fact that her partner took even a simple question so seriously. "I only know the names of people that I bonded with for some reason. I've had five different tent mates, and I've ridden with different teams through the years. This is actually the first time that I'm not with a team."

"How does that work?" Jamie asked.

"There are a lot of different groups that train together, and are sometimes sponsored together. Bike shops, hospitals, small businesses and even schools sponsor teams. I don't like to stick with a team for more than one year though," she admitted. "I like to get to know a lot of people, and that's harder to do if you're with the same group all of the time."

Just then a very attractive woman, who looked like she knew Ryan rather well, approached and straddled the bench, facing her. "Hi, Ryan," she said in a very friendly tone. "Long time, no see."

Ryan smiled easily and greeted the woman. "Hi, Carly" she said. "It has been a long time. How did your training go this year?"

"Not nearly as well as last year. You brought out the best in me on those training rides," she said with a suggestive smile. "So what have you been up to?"

Ryan gave her a brilliant smile and put her arm around Jamie's shoulders. "I've been busy falling in love," she said proudly. "Carly, this is Jamie."

Carly looked a bit taken aback, but she rallied and extended her hand to Jamie. "I've got to admit, I'm a little surprised to meet the woman who actually tamed this little cat," she said as she patted Ryan's leg.

"Oh, she isn't that wild," Jamie said with a forced smile.

"That's what you think," Carly purred as she got up, pausing just a second to pat Ryan's cheek in a familiar fashion. "Take care, girls," she said airily as she walked away.

"You don't know everyone you've introduced me to as well as you know Carly, do you?" Jamie asked suspiciously, as they both watched the attractive woman saunter away.

Ryan blushed deeply as she replied, "Um, not all of them."

Jamie just laughed as she shook her head, "I don't know how I'm going to keep you interested in me after all of the other women you've known."

Ryan slipped her arms around her waist and kissed her deeply for several minutes. "I don't even notice other women any more," she said sincerely. "You're more than enough woman to satisfy me for the rest of my life," she added emphatically.

Jamie's blush rivaled Ryan's as she whispered, "We're in a pretty public place, you know."

"I know. I'm just trying to stop any more old flames from disturbing us," she grinned as Jamie pinched her hard on the side.

"So you just kiss me to keep people away?" she asked with a mock glower.

"No, I kiss you to make my knees weak," she replied as she gave her another series of knee-weakening kisses. "What people do with this informative display is their choice," she said with a satisfied smile.

When they returned to the meeting spot, everyone was there. Caitlin immediately reached for Ryan, who gladly accepted her. The baby was wearing her new t-shirt, and she looked positively adorable. She had on a little baseball cap that Ryan had bought her not long ago, and after she gave Jamie a sloppy kiss, she happily sat on Ryan's shoulders to watch the parade of people.

Another ex-lover happened by, this one much more polite. Ryan introduced Jamie and, as the woman looked from Caitlin to Jamie, she finally asked in surprise, "Is this your baby?"

Ryan laughed as she introduced the rest of her family and indicated Caitlin's parents. The woman finally wished them well and went to find her riding partners. "Well, that went better than the last one," Jamie decided.

"I really tried to date nice women, but once in a while I didn't screen them properly," she admitted sheepishly.

"I've seen you in action, Ryan. I think your screening process was a little lax," she said as she playfully jabbed her riding partner in the stomach. "Unless you think an eyebrow wiggle really is a sufficient screening tool."

"Ohhh, you really do have my number, don't you?'

"I most certainly do. So don't try any funny business," she said, poking Ryan in the chest for good measure.

At 6:30 the Opening Ceremonies got underway. Willie Brown, the Mayor of San Francisco, and a large number of the Board of Supervisors were in attendance. The gay and lesbian community was a big supporter of the mayor, and the elegant, handsome African-American man genuinely returned the affection. He spoke extemporaneously for a few minutes, then various members of the ride team and the San Francisco AIDS Foundation said a few words. After the speeches were finished, a hush settled over the crowd as the directors of both the San Francisco AIDS Foundation and the Gay and Lesbian Center of Los Angeles came onto the stage. Six volunteers somberly guided a riderless bike up the center aisle through the throng. The quiet grew heavier as the assembled crowd paused to remember exactly why they had dedicated themselves to participate in the ride.

The speaker began, "This morning we begin a magical journey. A journey of exploration, a journey of wonder, a journey of commitment. A journey we make together. To see what exists beyond what we thought we could accomplish as individuals. To see what exists beyond the limits commonly ascribed to humankind.

"To open the treasure chest that is ours when we meet on common ground. To find a new horizon that will give the world a glimpse of a different, kinder, magical way to live.

"Please turn your eyes to the center lane, and witness the bicycle being led down the path. This bicycle has no rider. See the empty space above the seat and the pedals. See the empty space behind the handlebars.

"The empty space inside the helmet that hangs at the side. See that empty space, and remember.

"Let us together remember the friends, and the loved ones, that we have lost to AIDS. This year, last year. Years ago. All of them, still in our hearts and our minds. Remember their faces. Remember their laughter. Remember their lives, their hopes, and their dreams."

Jamie looked up sharply when she heard a small quiet cry, almost like a wounded animal. Turning quickly she saw her partner bent over, obviously trying to compose herself, but having absolutely no success. Before she could move toward her, Maeve put both of her arms around the crumpling body and pulled Ryan's head up to her shoulder. Her body shook with deep, wracking sobs as she allowed herself to be comforted like a small child.

As much as she wanted to reach out to Ryan at that moment, something stopped her. She took a few deep breaths feeling Annie's arm drape around her waist, and in that moment, she knew what it was. She hadn't known Michael and neither had Annie. As much as the two women might empathize with the pain of losing a beloved young man, neither of them could know how that loss had felt to their loved ones. This was a pain that could only truly be shared by those who had experienced it.

The speaker continued; "Remember their love. Let us feel all of them with us right now. Among us. Looking over us. Their hearts overflowing with joy this morning, and proud that we were their friends; as we embark on this courageous endeavor, let us use this moment to invite them to come with us, to keep us safe, to carry us up the difficult hills. Through the rain. And against the wind. To be there with us when the road is difficult.

"To be there with us, when we feel like giving up. Let them give us strength, let them give us joy, and let them give us the courage to continue. Their spirit is here to ride with us. Let us carry it, keep it, and let it fill up the empty space, until there is no empty space.

"It's time, everyone; the moment is here. Make this everything you have ever hoped it could be. With our brothers and sisters who have been lost to AIDS, together, we begin California AIDS Ride 6."

As Jamie stood in the throng, she felt a swelling of emotion in her chest that became almost painful as these last words were uttered. In that moment, she felt prouder of herself than she ever had in her life. Not just because she had worked so hard, although that was part of it. Rather, she was proud that, for once in her family's history, someone had tried to make a difference in someone else's life. Not with money, since that was no sacrifice at all for a family such as hers; this was a sacrifice of her time and her effort and her safety and her will. She was about to challenge herself to do something that was going to be terribly difficult, and she was doing it out of love for people that she did not, and probably never would, know. She was doing it for the tens of thousands of people in California who were affected by this deadly disease. Yes, she was doing it for Ryan and the rest of the O'Flahertys, to show her support for their loss, but she was primarily doing it to show that people with AIDS mattered, and would continue to matter, until the scourge was completely and irrevocably destroyed.

There was not a dry eye amongst the O'Flahertys, as each of them focused their thoughts on their beloved Michael. Ryan lifted her head as Maeve fished out tissues from her purse, and they all spent a few moments composing themselves. Ryan leaned in close to her aunt and whispered something that was greeted by a smile and a kiss on her cheek as the smaller woman reached up and captured the last few tears with her fingertips.

Ryan indicated with a nod of her head that it was time to get in line to retrieve their bikes. Another round of tears accompanied their departure, and this time Jamie was a full participant. When Martin hugged Jamie, he leaned over and whispered, "Take care of my little one, Jamie. This is very hard on her."

"I will, Martin," she promised fervently.

They were just about to sneak away to join their assigned group when they heard a pathetic "Nooooooo," come from Caitlin's little mouth. Ryan dashed back to kiss her soundly and give her a firm squeeze, and then she jogged back to Jamie's side. "God, that's hard to do," she muttered as she looked back to see a screaming Caitlin frantically trying to extricate herself from Tommy's grip. Jamie was still too choked up to reply, so she merely gripped Ryan's hand more firmly.

After they retrieved their bikes, they checked their tires, made sure all of their tools and supplies were in their packs, and put on their helmets. Ryan actually did most of the work since Jamie's hands were shaking too badly to be of much use. Ryan made her stand still as she applied another layer of sunblock to her face and neck, Jamie felt a little like she was receiving final inspection from her commanding officer before the big battle began.

At 7:15 the first riders pulled out to the strains of blaring, inspirational music and the cheers of the assembled throng. Because of the huge number of riders, it took quite a while before they could move. Ryan kept giving her encouraging glances, but she knew her body would not calm down until they were underway. Jamie's heart was nearly beating out of her chest by the time they started, but once they started riding, she began to feel better when her rubbery legs could actually propel the bike. Hundreds and hundreds of people lined the street leading out of Fort Mason, all of them waving and cheering the riders on. The thought crossed Jamie's mind that riding a bike in a huge crowd was not really easy to do in the best of circumstances, but with her eyes continually filled with tears in an outpouring of emotion, it was nearly impossible. Luckily, they were going quite slowly and no decisions had to be made. They just moved with the crowd and let the energy and the positive vibrations carry them along.

After a few minutes, the riders started to separate, and it became easier to concentrate on maintaining proper position and pedal cadence. Jamie lost herself in the process of riding, letting her mind go blank except for the sensation of pedaling. She kept a low level of awareness for the condition of the street and the distance she was from other riders, but for the first time that she could recall she was in a deep level of concentration, where everything just flowed. Every fifteen minutes her watch alarm buzzed, and she grabbed a water bottle and guzzled as much as she could get down; even this interruption didn't disturb her focus. As they left the city, her concentration started to flag, and she spent some time just looking around.

Ryan was just ahead of her, and she focused on her for a few long minutes. She quickly learned that watching Ryan from this vantage point was not a good idea. She found herself being nearly hypnotized by the twitching of Ryan's butt when she stood on her pedals, and she was forced to jerk her attention away. Are you suicidal? she chided herself, as she focused on the other riders and passing scenery.

They stopped at the first pit stop about thirteen miles out. It was terribly crowded, but Ryan assured her that this was an anomaly, and that subsequent stops would be less hectic. The crowds didn't dampen the cheerfulness of the volunteers who handed out snacks and water. They greeted each rider with a smile and offered encouraging words. Ryan methodically took the water bottles and added powdered drink mix from her pack. After she was satisfied with the mix, she poured them into the three bottles that each of them carried on their bikes. "You're going to be a fanatic about that stuff, aren't you," Jamie smirked as she watched her little scientist work away.

"You betcha," Ryan agreed, her mouth curling into a tiny smile as she concentrated on pouring. "And as proof, we're not leaving until you drink every little drop of this down." She handed her partner the bottle and supervised her consumption with a smile at her compliance. The day was still very cool, but Ryan knew that dehydration could occur during the coolest weather, and she was not going to let that happen to her partner on her watch.

Jamie started to get onto her bike, but Ryan insisted that they move away from the crowd and take a few minutes to rest. "But it's only thirteen miles," Jamie complained. "We've done lots more than that without a break."

"I know. But this is different. Now sit down here and let me massage your thighs for a minute."

The little orange bike was dropped like a hot rock. "Why didn't you say so in the first place?" she laughingly asked, as she dropped to the ground.

Ryan started to work on her thighs, smiling to herself when Jamie's lids started to droop almost immediately. "Boy, you're easy," she grinned as she picked up the pace, trying to invigorate her.

"I know," she moaned. "You start rubbing me, and I'm powerless to stay awake. It's just so calming."

"It's good to be calm when you're riding in a huge pack like this," Ryan observed. "How are you doing with the traffic?"

"Umm, pretty good," she decided. "It was a little dicey coming out of the city, but once the road started to open up a little I kinda got into it. It just makes you feel like you're part of something, you know?"

"I do indeed," Ryan agreed as she gave her a little slap on each leg. "Let's rock!"

They took off again, riding in a fairly large group until they reached the second pit stop. The first thirty miles of the ride was through dense urban clutter, but as they arrived at Stop Two they could see more rolling, open scenery before them. Jamie knew that one of the worst hills of the ride was coming up, and she wanted to ask for a little reassurance, but she would feel childish doing so. Ryan went to wait in the long line for the Porta-Potty, giving Jamie a stern glance when she said she did not need to join her. When she returned, Jamie was working on her second bottle of her drink mix. Ryan began her lecture, but Jamie held up her hand to stop her, "If you don't have to go to the bathroom at every pit stop, you're not drinking enough!" she said sternly. They both laughed as she forced herself to drink three bottles of her drink mix and eat a banana and some trail mix. When she had finished, she trotted over to get in line for the Porta-Potty.

When Jamie returned, she gave Ryan a kiss and said, "Thanks for taking care of me."

"I've never had a more pleasurable job," Ryan assured her as she began to rub the tension from her shoulders. "Big hill coming up, huh?" Ryan asked softly as she continued to rub.

"Yeah," Jamie replied noncommittally.

"Nervous?"

"Umm...a little."

"No need to be," Ryan said firmly as she leaned over and kissed her cheek. "It's strenuous, but not nearly as bad as some of our training up in the hills. Guaranteed," she assured her.

"Thanks," Jamie murmured as she turned and wrapped her arms around Ryan's damp waist. "You can always tell when I'm nervous, can't you?"

"Ohh, I don't know if 'always' is the right word. You give off some physical cues that are pretty telling?"

"Really?" she asked in surprise. "Like what?"

"One big one," Ryan said as she hopped back on her bike, "you stop talking!" Her laughter flowed back over her shoulder as she stomped on her pedals trying to avoid the dreaded pinch.

The four-mile climb up Highway 92 was tough going for almost everyone. The day was beginning to heat up, and the highway was quite narrow. As they labored up the hill, Ryan dropped back to ask if Jamie minded if she let out a little speed on the way down. "You go right ahead, Speedy," she panted. "I'll catch you later." As she gave her a smile she added, "I want you to have fun today, Ryan. So you do what you need to do to get your juices flowing."

"Well then I'd better hold back, because the quickest way to get my juices flowing is to stay very close to you." The flashing white smile that accompanied this sentiment made Jamie wish they could stop for a moment and share a kiss, but she didn't want to interrupt her momentum, so she satisfied herself with blowing a kiss to her grinning partner.

Following Ryan up the long, steep grade, she gave silent thanks for all of the hours of hard training that they had put in. She was actually quite proud of herself and spent a few minutes just feeling the power of her legs as they propelled her continually uphill.

They reached the crest after what seemed like an hour. Jamie heard her partner let out a whoop of pure excitement as she stomped on her pedals, hurling herself down the steep hill. She followed at a much saner rate of speed; nonetheless, she was flying down the hill at 38 m.p.h.

After they had leveled out a bit, they turned onto Highway 1. Ryan pulled over and stood just off the wide bike lane, waiting for Jamie with a huge grin on her face. Jamie pulled up next to her and watched her grin turn to a smug little smile as she wiggled one eyebrow at her. "You're the fastest, you're the coolest," Jamie opined in a sing-song fashion.

"I'm glad you think so," Ryan said smugly as she gave her a hug.

After the successful scaling of the big hill, Jamie was more than ready for the next twelve miles before lunch. As she quickly found out, the seemingly flat terrain was deceptively hilly. She began to dread every dip since she knew that a hill would quickly follow, but she concentrated on her cadence and let herself enjoy the lovely scenery, trying to take her mind off the effort she was expending. They arrived at the lunch stop and practically wrestled to be first in line. For the very first time in their relationship, Jamie ate everything on her plate and was actually looking around for more. Ryan stared at her as she finished off her second apple with a flourish. "I've created a monster," she said sadly.

There were still plenty of snacks available, and Ryan grabbed a couple of energy bars to tide her over. After three more bottles of water, a short thigh massage, and a few kisses, they were ready to go again.

The ride down the homestretch was aided by a nice tailwind the entire way; even though they had to cover 50 miles, the distance seemed much shorter. Nonetheless, it was 3:30 by the time they rode into the large city park in Santa Cruz, their home for the night. The volunteers had prepared the area beautifully, clearly marking every area.

Their first task was to find the security area for the bikes. Jamie was impressed by the system they had installed to keep track of all 3,000 bikes, obviously not an easy task. The area was segmented into large sections, with each one named after an international city. They picked Madrid, one of Jamie's favorite spots, and quickly hung their bikes from the tall saw horses placed there for that purpose. Actually, Ryan hung both bikes, as the sawhorses were really quite tall.

Jamie was ready for a long nap, a hot Jacuzzi and an hour-long massage; however, before she could partake in two out of three, they had to find their assigned camping spot. They were given #J-22, and Ryan showed Jamie how to find the spot by using the small markers placed near the ground. After locating their spot, Ryan generously offered to go wait in line and get a tent and all of their gear. Jamie considered the offer for less than a second before she gratefully accepted. She wandered off to look for the shower trucks as Ryan gamely stood in line for a tent.

She finally found the shower truck after spotting a number of people with wet hair and scrubbed skin coming from one direction. Regrettably, the line was long, but she knew that she would feel better once she got the road grime off so she stayed in line. It moved rather slowly, and there were still five people in front of her when Ryan jogged up carrying her toiletries, a swimmer's towel and a change of clothes. Jamie smiled brightly at her thoughtfulness. "I was just standing here knowing I should leave to get my stuff, but I was too tired to move," she admitted.

Ryan helped her pull off her bike shoes and socks, when it became obvious that Jamie's legs were too weak to support her in an off-balance position. With a kiss, Ryan went to the rear of the now very long line and waited patiently while Jamie neared the front. Luckily, moments after she gained her spot, a buddy from the first ride got in line behind her.

"Pretty early to already be waiting on your tent mate hand and foot, isn't it?"

Ryan turned and barked out a laugh, hugging the grinning woman who stood behind her. "Melinda!" she cried. "I haven't seen you since the last ride! How have you been?"

"Good, very good in fact," she admitted. "Jared started school this year, so Stacy and I have been able to start working the same shift."

"Wow, I can't believe that," Ryan mused. "I still remember how anxious you were on the first ride. I've never seen someone search out public phones like you did."

"Well, waiting for your lover to have your first child was a pretty big deal," she reminded her with a grin.

"Is Stacy here?" Ryan asked.

"Oh yeah, she's around here somewhere. Jared is with my mom for the week, back home in San Jose. I'm sure he'll come back thoroughly spoiled, as usual," she conceded good-naturedly. "So, who's the cutie you were waiting on?" she asked.

"I can't disagree with the description, but she's a lot more than my tent mate," Ryan said rather proudly. "She's my," Ryan paused for a moment, trying to decide on the proper term, "partner," she decided. "Jamie is my life partner."

"YOU! You're in a relationship?!"

"Hey," Ryan objected, a little hurt by the amazement in her voice, "I need love too, you know."

"Umm hmm," she said suspiciously. "You've never seemed to be lacking in that department, Ryan."

"Oh yes, I have," Ryan assured her seriously. "I've been starved for love, Melinda, but I tried to satisfy that need by having sex. There's no comparison," she stated firmly.

"You really are in love," she said slowly, still slightly amazed.

As she was considering this unexpected development, Jamie came back and gave Ryan a tiny kiss. "I feel so much better," she said wanly.

"Hon, this is an old friend," Ryan said as she indicated Melinda. "Melinda, this is Jamie Evans. Jamie, Melinda Stone."

"Good to meet you," Jamie said as she extended her clean hand.

"Amazed to meet you," Melinda murmured, still astonished that Ryan had entered into a committed relationship.

Ryan shot Jamie a glance and said, "Melinda has known me for six years. She's seen the annual changing of the guard."

"I see," Jamie drawled good naturedly. "Did she ever introduce any of them as her lover?" she asked Melinda.

"Nope," she replied immediately. "It was always more like, 'This is...what was your name again, Honey?'"

Ryan gave her a playful cuff for that comment. "I have never, in my entire life, referred to a woman like that," she insisted.

"Just kidding, Sport," Melinda agreed. "But it was always obvious that they were just passing through. I get a completely different feeling from this one, though," she conceded as she smiled at Jamie's proprietary hold on Ryan's dirty, sweaty body. "If she can hug you when you're that grimy, she must be in for the long haul."

"The longest," Jamie heartily agreed as she kissed the dirt-flecked lips smiling down at her.

After a brief chat Ryan asked Jamie for her dirty clothes, which she dutifully handed over. "I'm going to do laundry when I'm finished," she said with a smile. "Do you remember where our tent is?"

"J-22," she replied decisively.

"Very good," Ryan said as she patted her on the head. "Go take a nap after you drink another bottle of water," she ordered.

After her showering and laundry duties were done, Ryan headed back to the tent. She found Jamie sprawled across both sleeping bags right in the middle of the floor. She didn't have the heart to wake her, so she went in search of something to do, or, even better, something to eat. An hour later she opened the tent flap and crawled in next to her sleeping partner, cradling her close. After a few moments Jamie started to awaken. She sniffed a few times, then she rolled over and sniffed again. "I smell..." she licked around Ryan's mouth for a moment as she pronounced, "Mexican food," she said proudly. After a moment she sat up in surprise, "Hey! Did you eat dinner without me?"

"Only my first course," Ryan replied happily. "I've got plenty of room for seconds," she said as she patted her flat tummy.

"C'mon," Jamie said as she crawled out of the tent. "I'm starved!"

The long dinner line snaked along all too slowly for Ryan's unsated stomach. Jamie smoothly diverted her attention when she asked, "How do you think today went, Babe?"

As was her fashion, Ryan paused and considered the question, and her answer, thoroughly before she replied. "I was very, very pleased with how today went," she pronounced. "The day just flew by, mostly because I was so focused on you. I've had a lot of friends and a few bedmates that I cared about on the ride, you know. But none of them captured my attention like you did today. It was a very, very pleasant diversion," she decided with a big grin.

"You're too sweet," Jamie beamed as she stood on her tip toes for a kiss. "But I don't like the inequity of attention you've been lavishing on me. I want to make you feel better, too."

"But I feel fine," Ryan assured her. "I'm used to this kind of pace, so it's really not that big of a deal for me."

"Nonetheless," Jamie insisted, "tomorrow we share shoulder rubs and leg rubs. You're not getting out of here without some pampering."

"Oh, all right," Ryan muttered in mock disgust. "You are so hard to live with!"

"I know," Jamie soothed. "And you're such a saint to put up with me."

"It's just an act of mercy," she innocently replied. "You're like the little dog who followed me home. If I don't take you in, no one will."

"Ggrrrrr," the feisty little stray replied.

"Was today like you expected?" Ryan asked, as they worked on their desserts.

"Yeah, I'd have to say that you prepared me beautifully for the physical aspects," Jamie replied, after taking a minute to consider her answer. "But you didn't give me any idea of how...well...gay it was," she said with a chuckle.

"You didn't know most of the people would be gay?" Ryan asked, having assumed that Jamie would guess the event would be largely gay.

"No, no," the smaller woman laughed. "I mean gay! Like festive!"

"Ohhh," Ryan laughed. "Well, it is pretty darned festive."

"Yeah," Jamie agreed. "I didn't realize that so many people would decorate their helmets, and wear costumes. I swear I saw a bunch of guys dressed like flamingos!"

"Yeah, that's pretty common on the ride. That's one of the nicest things for me. People can really be creative. A lot of guys even dress in drag."

"I can't imagine doing this in full make-up," Jamie laughed. "But whatever floats your boat!"

They finished dinner by seven o'clock and spent a little time wandering around the tent city, Jamie marveling at all of the amenities. People were diligently working on ailing bikes in the repair area, every available masseuse was hard at work, and the medical trailers had a long line of people seeking relief from various minor injuries. There was even a small general store selling necessities. The entertainment started just as it was getting dark. Jamie was interested, but also very willing to go to bed right then. So they compromised by deciding to watch for half an hour, and then go to sleep.

After only a few minutes, Ryan excused herself. "I've got to go do something. Can you find the tent?"

Jamie nodded her assent as Ryan took off. After twenty minutes she made her way back to their temporary home. It was just 8:30 when she crawled in to find Ryan lying on her side in a fetal position. "Ryan, what's wrong?" she asked in alarm as she crawled up right next to her.

"Cramps," was her monosyllabic reply.

"Oh, you poor baby," she replied solicitously. "Did you take anything?"

"Yeah, I just took some ibuprofen. I'll be okay in a while."

"Do you usually hurt like this?" she inquired.

"No, not very often. I felt a little twitchy earlier, and I should have paid attention and taken some pills then. If I knock them out right away, I don't have any trouble. When I let them really get to me, it's much harder to get rid of them."

"Isn't there anything I can do?" she inquired, feeling helpless. "How about a massage?"

Ryan rolled over onto her back as she smiled up at her partner. "You'd really like to help, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, it's hard to see you in pain and not be able to do anything," she admitted.

"Well, sometimes it helps if you can just put your hand here," she said as she placed Jamie's hand right above her pubic bone. "And then kind of rock me."

Jamie did as instructed, rocking her very gently as she put firm pressure over her uterus. Ryan let out a deep sigh as the pressure began to relieve her cramping. After a long while Jamie asked, "Does one of your ovaries hurt more than the other?"

Ryan nodded, "Yeah, the right one." Jamie moved her hand over to the right side of her abdomen. She probed with her fingers for a moment until Ryan let out a little gasp. She then applied pressure to this area and kneaded until Ryan's face relaxed and she looked much more peaceful. "Boy, you have a great pair of hands there," Ryan said gratefully as Jamie climbed into her outstretched arms.

"Do you feel better?" Jamie inquired.

"Much," Ryan said as she kissed her tenderly. Jamie responded to the kiss, and slowly the intensity began to escalate.

"I thought about sleeping with you all day," Jamie murmured into her ear as they took a break.

"I thought about you too, but sleeping wasn't involved," Ryan replied with a leer as she placed more searing kisses on Jamie's smooth lips.

"For a sick girl, you sure do kiss good," she observed with admiration. After the passion between them rose another notch, Jamie began to notice that Ryan's body was relaxing in direct proportion to the increased beating of her heart.

Jamie wrestled the sleeping bags from under her now limp body and tossed the joined bags over the two of them. Placing one last tender kiss on her moist lips, she wrapped her arms around her. "Good night, Ryan," she whispered into her ear.

Ryan forced one eye open and looked at Jamie with a questioning glance and a little tilt of her head. "That's enough playtime, Sweetie. We both need to get to sleep. We've got a long day tomorrow."

"Okay," Ryan sleepily agreed, "But I don't think I can sleep before it's even fully dark out."

"Okay," Jamie soothed, whispering into her clean pink ear. "Just relax for a little while." Moments later she felt Ryan fall into a deep sleep in her arms.

Just after two a.m. Ryan woke from an insistent pressure in her bladder. She struggled out of Jamie's embrace, as well as the sleeping bag, and searched for her sweats with her hands. When she found them, she slid out the tent opening and fumbled her way into her clothes. She had left her sandals outside the tent, and she stepped into them on the way to the bathroom. It was quiet at the campsite, but the ever-present security personnel were on duty. She made it a point to walk by each person she saw to say hello and thank them for their vigilance.

As she approached the medical trailer, she realized that more than her bladder was causing her pain, so she stopped in to request some more ibuprofen. The woman on duty gladly fulfilled her request, also giving her a tampon. When she was finished she made her way back to the tent, realizing that she had not put her normal beacon on the top. She had learned through experience that finding your tent out of 1,500 identical ones on a dark night was no picnic. She usually put a light stick on the top of the tent when she left, but she'd been so groggy this morning that she had forgotten. She used her innate sense of direction and eventually found the 'J' section. To her relief, finding #22 was not too hard. She undressed outside and kicked her shoes off before climbing back in and settling down next to her lover.

She was moments from sleep when she heard a soft voice grumble, "I have to pee."

Using every bit of her self-control, she took a deep, even breath and asked, "Do you want me to go with you?"

"Do you have to go, too?" Jamie asked hopefully.

"Yeah, I have to go too," she replied, out of nothing but love.

After they completed their pit stop, Ryan stopped at the medical trailer again to snag an energy bar. The ibuprofen wasn't sitting well on her empty stomach, so she munched on the bar on the way back. This time the light stick was clearly in place, signaling them home.

As they climbed back into their little nest, Jamie automatically put her hand over Ryan's uterus and began to rock her gently. Ryan gazed at her sleepy green eyes in appreciation as Jamie mumbled, "You don't look like you feel so good." Ryan just nodded and closed her eyes, willing herself to focus only on her partner's healing touch. Within minutes she was sound asleep.