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Warnings and Disclaimers: This is a coming of age story and it deals with relationships and awakenings of the alternate nature. The characters are mine and mine only so do not rip them off. I would rate this story PG.
This is the first time I've attempted to write from a teenager's point of view and it has been a refreshing experience. That said, I haven't been a teenager in a while so let me know if you think some things could be written differently. And most importantly, thanks to glazzal for her editing prowess. She definitely righted the mess that was my grammar! by d a m n a t i o n shag_chic@hotmail.com It wasn't a very big tree, but it sure was rooty. It took us a full day of digging before we could even loosen it from the soil. Initially we were sorry that it had to go but by the end of a day and a half of digging, chopping and hacking at tenacious roots, we were totally over it. We were making space for a small shed but we couldn't feel very excited about that; it seemed like it would take a long time before a shed could be erected in the lonely bald patch. Then again, it did only take us a few days to build our treehouse, which Leonard and I called our Fortress. "Jo, Lenny, dinner's ready!" Mum was a pretty good cook. By the time I got to the table, Leonard was already halfway through his plate of chicken parmagiana and salad. "Thanks for your help today, sweetie," Mum said, ruffling my hair as I sat down. "Lenny, you'll choke if you don't slow down," Mum said, turning to Leonard. He didn't miss a beat and continued wolfing the rest of his dinner down. Leonard was my twin, a mere ten minutes younger than me. I always found that stupid: ten minutes younger? Who the hell cares? We're twins and we're equals. It's not as though we had a choice and could come out at the same time? People used to mistake us for each other but in the last six months, Leonard shot up so quickly that he now looked like the stretched out version of me. Puberty, what a pain. We've heard stories about it--the bleeding, voice breaking, babies, attraction to the opposite sex--but we didn't think it would be a big deal. We were wrong about that. On the day I first got my period, I fainted. We were having Physical Education at school and John had challenged me to a race. It wasn't anything out of the norm. The gravel felt the same under my scuffy running shoes and the sun was hiding behind the clouds, making the field look kinda gray. One minute I was speeding along, feeling the wind in my hair, and the next minute I was feeling weird and started seeing stars before I took a tumble and blacked out. I woke up in the sick-bay with grazes and scratches on my limbs and an over-friendly school nurse telling me that I was going to be okay and did I know how to wear sanitary napkins? That was when I found out I wasn't the only one in the room. The girl in the bed next to mine started snickering at what the nurse was saying, eliciting a frown from the nurse. And although I didn't exactly know why, I felt embarrassed, exposed. What was the nurse thinking, talking about sanitary napkins in broad daylight anyway? What was she going to talk about next? Bras? I hurriedly took that thought back. If she did start on bras I would just die of embarrassment. I hated those damn training bras. What were they training me for--breasts? If breasts felt as uncomfortable as training bras did, then I hoped that mine wouldn't grow. I preferred wearing singlets. I had been crossing my fingers, hoping that I would escape puberty's radar, but it seemed that I could only hide for this long. "Which class are you in?" the girl asked after the nurse left the room. I recognized her. Even though she was new to our school, she had quickly become part of the Popular group. Pretty strawberry blonde locks. Perfectly straight pearly whites. She even smelled sweet. My nose detected her soft, flowery perfume under the heavy smell of antiseptic in the sick-bay. I saw her looking questioningly at me and realized that she was waiting for an answer. "I thought you looked familiar. You've got a twin brother, right?" she said after I told her my class number. "Uh huh." People seemed to notice us a lot because we were twins. It was funny like that, being different. We were the only twins in our small neighbourhood school. "I'm Rachael." "Uhm. I'm Jo-ann." The nurse returned with a permission slip for me to go home earlier that day. I took the piece of paper from her and stuffed it into the back pocket of my shorts. Then I slid off the bed, tested my legs and found them in okay shape. I slipped out of the sick-bay, glad that I was escaping further scrutiny from the nurse. The ride home on my pushbike was only slightly uncomfortable. The pain in my lower belly had dulled to an ache. Mum rang the house shortly after I got home; the school nurse had rung her at work and she had called to check on me. After making sure that I knew where everything I needed was kept, she cheerfully informed me that she would make my favourite stir-fry dish for dinner and hung up. That night, snug in my sleeping bag under a square of stars that the hatch on the roof of our treehouse allowed me to see, I played the short and totally random conversation that I had with Rachael over and over in my mind. I loved sleeping in the Fortress when it was cool out; the season was changing. Leonard and I would have to work on the expansion of the Fortress though, if he still wanted to fit in here. I caught sight of a shooting star and smiled to myself before drifting off to sleep. "You want these jeans?" Leonard's old jeans were starting to look like one of Mum's capri pants. I snickered, nodded, and caught the flying article of clothing. "You're not gonna bury your nose in that thing the entire day now, are ya?" "Why, what do you wanna do?" Usually we would be at the markets with Mum. She had a bead stall. But the day was overcast and it was so nice and snug in my sleeping bag that I overslept. "I dunno. Not read, though. Let's go do something fun." I put my book away and scrambled out of the Fortress. We ended up walking through the park to the shops. A few kids from school hung out at the shops. Leonard, being the more sociable of us two, said hi to a few people who looked vaguely familiar to me. I never asked him how he knew all the older kids at school. Normally I just kept to myself. I wasn't reticent or anything, I just didn't have many friends. In a way, having this bond with Leonard was a double-edged sword. I never had to question if I belonged anywhere--no one and nothing could come between what Leonard and I had--but that also meant I never saw the need to form any kind of relationship with anyone else. "They're having a meteor shower party by the river later on," Leonard said. When I didn't say anything to that, he continued, "And we're invited." "You mean you're invited." "You're invited too. You're with me." I smiled crookedly at my brother. We were only fourteen this year but his lanky frame and serious eyes made him look older. He was always looking out for me. "Let's get some Coke and go down to the Hole and tube," he suggested. The Hole was a spot that Leonard and I claimed as our own. It was one of our favourite hang out spots when the weather was warm. Armed with two one-litre bottles of Coke and two bags of chips, we trudged down to the Hole. We had two tubes stashed away in a secret hiding spot near the Hole and so far it hid our tubes well. Either that or the people who have found and used them were good enough to put them back where they found them. We were in the middle of stripping when I remembered that I was bleeding. How the hell was I supposed to go swimming? "What's wrong?" Leonard was already in the water. "Come on, it's awesome in here." Mum did say something about water pressure making it okay to swim. Just the thought of it made me feel sick though. And how was I going to go in when I had that stupid sanitary napkin on anyway? "Hellooo... Jojo!" "Yea, hang on." I made up my mind and went behind a tree, much to Leonard's amusement. After a minute or two, I re-emerged and jumped into the water in my boardies and singlet. We frolicked in the cool water, and I fell asleep on a tube while Leonard dived into the water from different spots along the bank. The afternoon passed by quickly. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go to that party by the river at all. We had to go after dinner with Mum anyway, so I still had time to decide. We trudged home in companionable silence. I ended up at the party by the river after all. Leonard seemed unusually obstinate about it and I didn't want to be a spoilsport. The meteor shower wasn't due to start for another half hour; I was already dying to go home. The kids at the party didn't give me a second look. Most of them were drinking and some of them were getting really rowdy. Music was playing in the background, creating a barrier between the cool kids and myself. "Hey." I looked up to see John and I smiled, quite surprised to see him there. He handed me a can of beer, which I took after a moment's hesitation. I never really liked the taste of beer, but if it was up for grabs, I didn't see the harm in having some. "So, uh, you okay?" I realized he never knew why I fainted yesterday afternoon. I had gone straight home after the nurse dismissed me from the sick-bay, and I hadn't seen John till now. "Yea, I'm fine. Don't worry 'bout it." "You're not sick or anything, are ya? People only faint when they're really sick." "Nah. It's some yucky girl thing," I said finally. John blanched at that and looked at me in surprise. Perhaps he, like me, had only just realized that I was a girl. I mean, it wasn't as though we never knew I was a girl. It just wasn't something we thought about, if that made sense. "Let's not talk about it." John nodded vehemently, then gulped down his beer. I took a sip of my beer. The bitter taste enveloped my mouth and I almost spat it out but I swallowed it instead. I put the can next to me on the grass, not wanting the beverage anymore. Two minutes later, someone came along and knocked it over. "Oh, sorry!" An apologetic voice sounded in the dark. "I didn't see it. Can I get you another drink?" "S'okay," I mumbled, standing up and wiping at the wet patch on my shorts. "Jo-ann?" I looked up and saw that it was Rachael, the girl in the sick-bay. "Yea. Hi." I adjusted my headtorch so that it didn't shine in her eyes. Before she could say anything else, however, there came a howling in the darkness that made us all jump. Rachael grabbed my arm. "What the hell was that?" she said in a whisper. "Dunno." "Let's go look." John's sudden interruption in our conversation made us both jump again. I had forgotten that he was there. We had a torch--John's--and a headtorch--mine--between the three of us. The party was resuming around us--some kids were laughing again and making howling noises and someone turned up the music. I couldn't see Leonard anywhere so I trudged alongside Rachael and John. Investigating the source of the howling would be more interesting than hanging around the other kids. "Maybe we shouldn't do this," Rachael said when the music was out of earshot. "No one knows where we are or what we're doing." She sounded nervous. "What if it's some psychopath or a wild animal?" "There aren't any dangerous animals around here," John scoffed. I could feel his eyes rolling in the dark. I remembered then that she was new to the area. "Psychopath, then?" John had nothing to say about that but still we trudged forward. After a few minutes of not encountering anything, Rachael's grip on me loosened. "Wait," I said, halting our procession. "See those mushrooms over there? Look closely." John turned off his torch and I moved to turn my headtorch off as well after Rachael nodded. I blinked a few times and smiled at the glowing blue rings that the mushrooms made. John clicked his torch on and off a few times with its beam pointed at the mushrooms. "Oh wow," Rachael rasped out. "And look over there, fireflies!" John said. One of the fireflies came close to me and I reached out a hand quickly to make a grab for it. Careful not to squish it, I uncurled my fingers to show Rachael the insect. Rachael said that she had never seen one before and I chuckled at the wonder in her voice. We watched as the firefly flitted off my palm and into the trees. John came back with not one but two of them. "Sometimes Lenny and I have them in a jar in our Fortress." "Your fortress?" Rachael asked. I realized that I had just talked to a virtual stranger--one of the popular girls in school, at that--about the Fortress. "Yea. We have a, um, treehouse." Without us realizing it, the trees had opened up to a small clearing. Suddenly, the forgotten hand on my arm squeezed and a gasp escaped from Rachael. I tilted my head up and and sucked in a breath. The meteor shower had begun. "Awesome!" John exclaimed on my left. There had to be thousands of them, I thought in wonder. "They look like little streaks of fire," I said reverently. I felt Rachael smile in the darkness beside me and her grasp on my arm loosened and finally slid away. I wasn't sure how long we stood there in the clearing, looking up at the beautiful bleeding night sky. By the time the shower slowed to a trickle, my neck was aching some. Sticking my hands into my shorts pockets, I turned to look at John and Rachael. We shared a smile and a breathless look of awe. The memory of that evening stuck with me the entire weekend. I would catch myself smiling at nothing in particular. Thoughts of Rachael would pop up randomly throughout the day. I ran the few lines of our conversation in my mind over and over. I rolled my eyes at my mental self showing her the glowing mushrooms and the fireflies. "Showoff", I'd mumble under my breath, then wrinkle my nose and tried to think about anything other than that little bit of contact I had with her. I was half scared and half excited to go back to school. I saw her in the hallway as I was walking to class. I tried a tentative smile and a wave. She must have missed it, because she didn't respond. She was talking to Katie, a haughty looking girl with long, flowing hair that hung down her back. I absently wondered if she would get into trouble with the teachers because the rules said that girls with long hair had to tie it back or up. When we crossed paths again just before recess, I tried to strike up a conversation with her by the cooler. She walked away from me after giving me a weird smile and look. Her friends also gave me a funny, assessing look when they saw me try to talk to her. Suddenly I felt stupid. The over-imaginative side of me wondered if I had dreamt up that entire evening. I quickly did an about turn and stalked to the canteen, hoping that no one else other than Rachael and her friends had witnessed that. "So what's with that chick Rachael?" John asked when he sat down beside me with his tray of food. "What do you mean?" I asked, trying to appear nonchalant, still smarting from the slight. John shrugged. "Whatevs. I thought she was cool but she turned out to be like those up-themselves kids after all." Leonard caught sight of us and brought his tray from the Table of Jocks to where we were. As he plonked down heavily next to me, he looked from John's disgruntled expression to mine. "Wassup?" I grunted and John shrugged. I had pretty much been in my own world since the night of the meteors and Leonard had kept to himself as well so he had yet to hear about our little encounter with Rachael. We ate our lunch in relative silence. Sweeping my eyes across the canteen surreptitiously, I could easily pick out the different cliques in school. My gaze rested on Rachael, who was right smack in the middle of the Popular Table. She was looking at the nails of the girl seated next to her and they looked like they were having a very interesting conversation about what shade of pink would suit her, I thought to myself rather viciously. With John partially obscuring me from her line of sight, I could study her quite comfortably. Her hair was in a long plait with stray tendrils framing her heart-shaped face. She had large, brown eyes and soft, fine features. Her entire face lit up when she smiled, a fake warmth that had me fooled. Her eyes met mine for an instant and I quickly looked at John and tried to pretend that I was listening to his conversation with Leonard. All the while, my heart was thumping hard against my ribcage and I had to overcome the sudden urge to flee from the canteen. When I snuck another covert glance at Rachael, I saw that she had swapped places with someone else in the group and had her back to me. The possibility that she had done that because of me made my ears burn. "Yo, Jojo, were you listening at all?" Leonard poked my rib, making my frown darken. He had been yammering on about something, quite possibly inconsequential, like wanting to make the basketball team. "Yea," I lied. "Don't do that, you know I hate it when you do that," I grumbled, rubbing my side. The poke wasn't even that hard but I had no other outlet for my sudden annoyance. "Christ, are you PMT-ing?" Leonard said with a roll of his eyes. "What? Oh, shut up!" I all but yelled when I realized what he had just said. It must have been a term he had picked up from the telly or Mum or even other kids in school, but it was definitely hitting a very sore spot at the moment. I felt angry, hurt, embarrassed, annoyed and bewildered at the number of emotions that were rushing through me at once. "Jojo's PMT-ing, whoa! Look out for the crazy chick and her temper!" Leonard acted like a dog who had found a good bone to chew on. I wanted to hit his gleeful face. "Stop it, Lenny. It's not really funny," John said, catching the look in my eyes. Before Leonard could say anything more, however, I pushed my seat back in a loud scrape, grabbed my drink, and stomped out of the canteen. To hell with Rachael and Lenny and even John, who didn't immediately defend me, I thought unreasonably. The self-righteousness of it all fuelled my anger and I kicked at a stray empty can that was in my path. Even though I was supposed to help out with the Fortress after school, I decided to ditch John and Leonard and go off on my own. Who wanted to be around crazy PMT-ing girls anyway? I pelted down the street on my pushbike, my pinafore riding up my shorts-clad thigh. I always wore a pair of shorts under my uniform so I didn't have to worry about my undies showing, something that the teachers in school didn't seem to think proper. Well, screw them too, I thought flippantly, feeling quite superior in my defiant anger. Quite unconsciously, I ended up in the vicinity of the Hole. Jumping off my pushbike, I wheeled it alongside me as I trudged through the bush. Stripping down to my singlet and shorts, I leaped into the water. Stunned by the initial coolness of the water, I broke surface with a loud gasp. Then I wiped down my face with my hand and pushed my dark hair back. The slight figure by the tree made my heart flip in my chest. "Hi." The girl standing there had wavy brown hair and smooth tanned skin. She was smiling uncertainly; her awkwardness made me feel less wary. "Hello." She looked at me again and must have decided that it was okay to join me. She carefully lowered herself into the water. "It's so cold," she said with a slight shiver. Then she swam gracefully over to where I was. "I thought you were a boy," she said solemnly. I didn't know what to say to that but a boy was better than a PMT-ing girl so I smiled at her. "We just moved here last week," she said. "It's my first day of school tomorrow." Even though she didn't look it, Michaela was actually two years older than I was. Michaela said that it was probably due to her part-Asian heritage. "No one ever believes that Mum's forty," she said with a roll of her eyes. She didn't like being thought younger than her age. I suppose I wouldn't like that very much either. I never had that problem, thanks to my height. We spent the next few hours rather pleasurably in the Hole. She was good company after she got over her initial shyness. She knew a few really funny jokes and did really good impersonations of different characters in the Simpsons. She even had me clutching my sides with laughter a couple of times. In the course of our time together, I learnt that she had been home-schooled till recently. Her father had inherited a house from a distant aunt not too long ago and she and her younger sister were enrolled in our school. Her older brother was an apprentice carpenter and hadn't made the recent move with them. "I'm probably gonna be older than everyone in my class," she said with a woeful sigh. We had since migrated to lie on the grass. Dusk was falling and the temperature had dropped a few degrees. I shivered slightly in my singlet and moved to put my pinafore on. Michaela had been put in the class a year above mine and her younger sister who was my age was in the class below mine, presumably because it was already so close to the end of the school year. "You can hang out with me. If you don't mind, that is," I added hurriedly. I was surprised by my own suggestion. I wasn't normally this ready to make friends but in the past week, I had completely outdone myself. Michaela eyed me with a half-smile on her face. "And why would I mind that?" I shrugged. "You know. Older kids don't really like to hang around younger kids. It's not very... cool." I thought about Rachael and grimaced slightly. "Honey, us home-schoolers don't know school culture," she said in an adult manner that made me smile. She did sound and carry herself a lot different from the kids at school. And she had a face that was perpetually smiling; her cheeks dimpled easily. I felt comfortable around her. "Well I'd better go. It's getting late and Mum'll get worried," I said, reluctant to part company but eager to get out of the quickly chilling air. Michaela picked herself up from the grass too. She dusted the seat of her shorts and rested her hands on her hips. "Well, see you in school then." I watched her go up the path before jumping on my pushbike to ride off in the opposite direction. Michaela and Angela, her younger sister, were rather well-received at school. Angela was more petite than Michaela and was just as friendly with the same dimpled smile. They certainly got the boys' attention. Leonard and John quickly became the envy of many when Michaela wound her way through the lunch crowd to sit herself down at our table. "Angie's already made some friends," Michaela said when she sat down, as though we were long time hang out buddies. "I'm like, so bored in class. And what's the deal with those gawking boys? You'd think that this is an all boys school!" She paused in her tirade and noticed Leonard and John looking at her, not sure what to make of it--her sitting down at our table and talking as though she knew us. "I'm Michaela, by the way." "Um..." When Leonard and John didn't answer her, I spoke up. "This is Leonard. And that's John." Michaela smiled at them brightly. "Hey guys!" Then she stopped, looked at Leonard, then at me, then back at Leonard. "Talk about a spitting image." "They're twins," John blurted out before a slight flush painted his pale cheeks. "No shit, sherlock!" Leonard said, jabbing John in his middle. Michaela looked at me with her liquid brown eyes. "You never told me you had a twin," she said accusingly. "This is so cool!" Leonard and I shot each other uncomfortable looks. We never knew how to react to people's exclamation of how cool it was that we were twins. Fortunately, Michaela moved on to other things quickly. "And what's with that table of plastic looking people?" she said in a lowered voice. She was referring to the Popular Table. "They're the popular kids," John supplied helpfully. "Mostly made up of cheerleaders and jocks and rich kids. Snobs." "They're not all bad," Leonard said. "Some of them are kinda... you know, nice," he finished lamely, shooting a quick look to the table in discussion. "Oh yea, we forgot, you're friends with some of them. Figures," John said with a roll of his eyes. "What?" Leonard looked defensive. Michaela looked at their exchange with interest. "So. Who do you like in that group, Leonard? Spill." Leonard looked at her in surprise. "Wh-what?" he sputtered. I looked from Leonard to John to Michaela as I munched on my hamburger. Michaela was either very perceptive or she was in over her head. "What do you mean?" Michaela shrugged. "You like a girl--or someone at least--from the group. Which one is it?" It took Leonard a few seconds to work out what it was that she had just said and this time he looked outraged. "What, of course it's a girl I like!" John hooted. "Oh come on. We're like, in the twenty-first century?" Michaela said, waving a fry in the air. "My brother likes boys. Nothing wrong with that." That seemed to mollify Leonard slightly. "So, who is it, Lenny? Do you guys know?" she asked, looking at John and myself. She had fitted in with our tight-knitted group so easily, already calling Leonard by his nickname. I shook my head in the negative. Leonard scratched his nape uncomfortably, a blush creeping slowing up his cheeks. "Yvette?" John guessed. "No!" "Rachael." I flinched at the sound of her name and hoped that it wasn't her that Leonard liked. "Which one is that?" "Jared!" Leonard almost spurted out his drink at that. "You-!" We all burst out in laughter, eliciting looks from the kids around our table. Leonard had grabbed hold of John's collar and was shaking it furiously. "Don't joke about something like that!" he hissed, embarrassed. "It's Katie, all right? Christ!" He rubbed at a spot on his nape. "Katie!" John and I exclaimed, and were quickly hushed by Leonard just in case anyone else had overheard. "Which one is she?" Michaela asked inquisitively, her eyes studying the Popular Table. "Only the snobbiest one at that table!" John exclaimed, earning himself another jab in the middle. "Hey, lay off, buddy! She is a bi-" He caught the dark look on Leonard's face and managed to stop himself from finishing his sentence. "Well, she's not very friendly," he said instead. Beautiful, haughty Katie Jensen. She was the girl Rachael hung around with the most, the one who must get into trouble with teachers all the time for having her hair down. I had to admit, though, that she did have very pretty looking hair--a head of blonde curls that cascaded past her shoulders. She hardly gave anyone but the popular kids the time of the day. What exactly did Leonard like about her? "She's very pretty," Michaela commented, earning a look of approval from Leonard. Well, there was that, I supposed. It was probably why I liked Rachael, I thought, and almost choked on the little revelation. "You okay, Jo?" I nodded, still sputtering, and pushed my chair back, the harsh scraping sound making a few kids grimace and touch a hand to their ear. I ran out of the canteen and made a beeline for the toilet. Weeks passed. Michaela never stopped hanging out with us and soon, even John got over his nervousness around her after seeing her scramble up the tree after me. She wasn't prissy like the other girls and wasn't afraid to get dirty. When we went down to the Hole together, she was actually more game than I was at leaping off the rocks. Leonard, John and I spent most of our time after school training for the upcoming sports meet that was happening on the last day of school before the summer break. We were blessed in different ways--Leonard with speed, John with strength, and me with stamina. Michaela, like almost every other girl in school, was more concerned about the dance after the meet than the meet itself, and would not stop talking about what she was thinking of wearing. "What are you gonna wear, Jo?" she asked me one day. I bit my lip and shrugged. After a long moment's pause, I looked up from my book to see her peering at me and realized that she was waiting for an answer. "I'm not going," I said simply. "What? Why not?" "Not interested," I said, flipping the page of my book. I let out a cry of annoyance when the book was ripped out of my hand. "Give it back," I demanded. "Not until you answer me. Why aren't you going?" "I dunno... It's not my thing." I didn't add that I hadn't a clue what to wear. All that girly stuff was foreign to me and I would rather not indulge in it. "You have to go. Who'll I hang out with if you're not there?" "Lenny and John, I guess. And Angie." Michaela looked at me speculatively. "You know, I have a coupla dresses that I could lend you..." she suggested. "I'm too tall for your dresses." "Let's go buy you one then!" "No thanks." I snatched my book back and began thumbing through it to where I had left off. "Don't like 'em dresses." Michaela rested her chin on her fist and studied my face as I read my book. I started feeling a little uncomfortable at being stared at and lifted tired eyes from my book, answering her look with a raise of my brow. "You have really nice eyes, you know that?" she commented. "Anyway, how about a vest and pants then, instead of a dress?" I narrowed my eyes. "What do you mean?" "You can wear a vest and a pair of pants to the dance. It's okay, girls do that." "Yea right." "Well, what do you care what other kids do? I'm sure you won't be the only girl in pants anyway. I know for a fact that Michelle Taylor and Penny Brooks aren't wearing dresses." "Really?" "Uh huh. And I bet they won't be the only ones." "Will... will people think funny things about me if I do turn up in pants?" I asked hesitantly. Michaela rolled her eyes. "What do you care what people think? And what funny thing would people think of you?" I clamped my mouth shut, not wanting to share my crush on Rachael and not entirely sure if that had anything to do with my dislike of dresses. "Come on, let's go get you something nice to wear. I think you might be Sam's size." Sam was Michaela's older brother who didn't live at home anymore. "He won't mind." "All right," I said finally, giving in. Rachael would definitely be at the dance. My heart thumped painfully against my ribcage and I had to take long, deep breaths to calm myself down. The day was hot and the crowd milling about around the track made me nervous. I tried to blot them out of my consciousness as I began loosening my limbs. The 400m race was about to start and I had to focus on the track before me, not who was looking at me. My eyes swept the crowd involuntarily again, seeking out the girl I liked. I blew out a breath and told myself to concentrate. I wanted to win this so bad that my teeth ached. I wanted her to see me, to notice me, to regret not talking to me after that night in the clearing. "Runners please get in line." Our names blared through the loudspeaker, followed by loud cheers. I was surprised at the amount of attention my name drew. Chancing a glance at the spectators, I could see Michaela jumping madly up and down. That elicited a smile from me. I thought about the knight in my book going up to the lady he was competing for, requesting for a kerchief to tie around his lance... At the sound of the whistle, we took our positions. The spectators faded away; the only sound I could hear was that of my heart pounding in my ears. I stared at the redness of the track that stretched out before me and breathed slowly, in and out, through my nose and out my mouth. Then the shot was fired and I was up and away. I paced myself, concentrating on my breathing, ignoring everyone else around me, knowing that the moment I started taking notice of my competition, I would falter, panic, and lose my momentum. I settled into a comfortable pace, enjoying the feel of the wind going through my hair. Then, at the last hundred metres, a familiar buzzing in the pit of my stomach began and I tightened my stomach muscles. I began increasing my speed and surpassed Jacqueline Timms, then Kelly Chung. As the distance between myself and the ending line contracted, my limbs got heavier and heavier. I passed by Tara Whitfield and was soon neck to neck with Theresa Sweets; we were about three steps behind Maia James. My lungs were burning but adrenalin powered me and I crossed the line second, a mere half a step in front of Theresa. Breathing raggedly, I couldn't wipe the wild smile off my face. Silver wasn't gold but silver wasn't something to be scoffed at either. After shaking hands with the other runners, I looked at the crowd and pumped a fist in the air at Michaela and John while the winners' names were announced. Leonard was probably warming up for his second race and was nowhere to be seen. Then I caught sight of Rachael in her cheerleading outfit and my stomach did a cartwheel. Rachael's hair was tied back with a blue ribbon in a high ponytail. She looked really good in the form fitting blue and yellow top and short skirt. And she was smiling in my direction. I held her eyes for a long moment and secretly thrilled at the deepening of her smile. I combed a hand through damp hair and cleared the tracks for the next race. Weaving through the crowd and accepting congratulations from vaguely familiar looking people, I finally made my way to where Michaela and John were. "Good one, Jojo!" John said, thumping my back. I thought Michaela looked a little odd but her face broke out easily in her usual dimpled smile and the moment passed. "Yea, thanks," I mumbled shyly, feeling very pleased with myself. The shot signalling the start of the race sounded and all our attentions were drawn to the race. Leonard came in third in the 400m race. A bronze in 400m and a gold in 100m dash--quite a haul. A group of girls squealed loudly when his name was announced and the three of us threw each other knowing looks. Leonard was generating quite a following with his dark features and athletic prowess. "All right girls. It's my turn next," John said, flexing his arm. "I expect a lot of screaming," he warned. Michaela and I shooed him off laughingly. Loud music played from the intercom, hushing the crowd considerably. The cheerleaders took their positions in the centre of the field and began their routine to Lady Gaga's Poker Face. I picked Rachael out from the rest of the cheerleaders rather easily and gazed at her, safe from anyone's detection. She was slim but strong and did handstands smoothly. A bit of hair fell out of her ponytail and hung down the side of her face. I grinned to myself when I caught her blowing at it to get it out of her face. I cheered as loudly as everyone else when the routine ended, and met Michaela's eyes. "What?" "Nothing." "So why you looking at me like that?" She shrugged. "Like what?" "Never mind." Leonard and I stared at each other in the full length mirror. He was wearing a white pin-striped shirt with black prints splashed down his right shoulder and chest, tucked out of black pants that hung on his slim boyish hips. He had a blazer in his hand, black with white prints splashed down its side, matching his shirt nicely. I, on the other hand, was wearing the vest-pants combination that Michaela had suggested. The midnight blue vest belonged to Sam and the black straight cut pants was something that Leonard had outgrown in the last few months. Even though my outfit was form fitting, I didn't have any curves to flaunt. "You look like a boy," Leonard said. "That's cos I haven't put any make-up on her yet," Mum announced from behind us. I turned around with a groan. "Come on, Jojo, just a little?" she coaxed. I finally gave in and let her put mascara, eye shadow, a little rouge and lip gloss on me. When I looked into the mirror again, I did a double take. It was as though I was looking at a very familiar looking stranger. I discreetly wiped some of the rouge off my cheeks but I left the rest of the make-up alone. Then Mum made me turn back to her again so that she could apply glitter on my face and arms. I rolled my eyes at her enthusiasm and wondered why, if she loved to dress and make me up so much, she hardly did it. "Okay, now you look like a girl. Weird." I jabbed Leonard in his side as he laughed. His voice was deeper and slightly scratchy and he was definitely beginning to fill out. His square jaws and crooked nose--thanks to a dead branch and a kite in the tree incident a few years ago--were the obvious differences between his face and mine. His dark, almost black hair was around the same length as mine, just brushing his collar. He was due for a haircut soon. "You think Katie'll dance with me tonight?" he asked, plucking at his shirt nervously when Mum left the room to put her make-up away. "Don't see why not. You're quite the star," I replied honestly. "And doesn't she kinda like you?" Leonard had finally revealed why he was so insistent on going to the party at the river that night. It was because Katie was going to be there and he had wanted a chance to talk to her. He was friendly with some of the older boys so she wasn't adverse to talking to him. By the end of the night, he had fallen head over heels for the beautiful girl of his dreams. "Yea but... she's got so many guys after her...." I was hardly the right person to give any sort of advice on this topic, so I wisely kept my mouth shut and let him stew over his insecurities. "Look at you two. I can't even tell you apart from behind," Mum said from the door. "I'm a little taller, Mum," Leonard said dryly, getting a chuckle from Mum. "And broader shoulders, a perkier arse..." He started laughing when I gave him a friendly punch to his shoulder. Mum came over and wrapped her hands around both our waists. "I love you two. All right, all ready to go, Mr. and Miss Vainpot?" "And who do you think we inherited that from?" Leonard teased. "You're funny tonight, all psyched up to see some girl you're in love with?" Mum quipped, then snorted at the flush that crept up Leonard's face. "Do we need to talk about safe sex?" she teased in return. "Mum!" Blushing furiously now, Leonard began pushing her out of the room. "I think it's time to go. We'll be late meeting John and Michaela at the dance." "Just sayin'," Mum said shrugging, throwing a wink my way. We weren't what you would call fashionably late but when we arrived at the hall the dance was held in, there were quite a number of students milling about already. The lights were dimmed and streamers and balloons hung from the ceiling. The school had hired a DJ for the night and he was busy setting up at the moment. A local band was also asked to perform for about forty-five minutes later on in the evening. "Hey guys!" Leonard and I turned to see a hugely grinning John approaching us. Then we realized that the stunner of the girl standing beside him was actually Michaela. "Whoa, you look... well, great," Leonard said, eyes widening on seeing Michaela. She looked beautiful in a short, blue dress her hair all done up, tendrils of curls framing her face. She was also in precarious looking heels. "How the hell do you balance in those?" he said, voicing my thoughts. "Jojo could never do that!" He laughed when I cuffed him playfully. "And neither could I." "Thank you," Michaela said, her face dimpling prettily as she smiled. "You guys don't actually need anything in the height department. And these..." she kicked up her right foot, "... just take practice." "You should have seen the looks on Justin's and Terence's faces!" John crowed. "When they saw me walking in with Michaela, whoa!" His cheeks were flushed and I noticed that he looked at Michaela differently tonight. It was how he had looked at her when she first sat at our table. "You two look really good too," Michaela said, trailing her eyes up and down Leonard's and my outfit, wanting to divert the attention from herself. "Sam's vest fits you perfect." "Thanks." I smiled at her and she looked away quickly. "Ready to make your move on Katie tonight?" Michaela teased Leonard as put her arm through Leonard's. John and I trailed after them. "You look nice too," he said shyly. "You look pretty with make-up on." "Only with make-up on?" I said, sounding affronted. We shared a chuckle. "So, uh, is Michaela your date for tonight?" John shook his head. "Nah, Dad just gave her and Angela a ride here and Angie found her friends almost immediately so it was just the two of us. She looks real pretty," he said, sounding rather wistful. "But you know, we're just mates. Like you and I. It just feels a little different when you girls put on make-up. And Michaela in her dress and heels..." he trailed off, looking over to Michaela the same time I did. They were standing by the punch table and she was laughing at something Leonard said. Her lips curved up so naturally; it seemed as though she never stopped smiling. The bracelets on her wrists jangled as she moved, and her matching dangling necklace glittered. She did look different, beautiful--not that she wasn't beautiful normally, but tonight it felt as though her beauty was brought up to the surface. She tore her eyes away from Leonard's and saw John and I looking at her. "What?" she asked, looking down at herself. "Why are you guys looking at me like that?" John and I looked away immediately, and our gazes met. "Nothing," we said in unison. I hooked an arm over John's shoulder and moved us towards Leonard and Michaela. "Just thirsty. When were you guys gonna stop flirting and pour us some punch?" "We were not flirting!" Leonard retorted. "You guys are just jealous that Michaela's hanging off my arm instead of either of yours. Uh huh, you too, Jojo," he said to my sputtering face. "That's so sweet, Lenny," Michaela said, batting her eyelashes at him. I frowned at her flirtatious tone then saw that Leonard was already distracted by something behind me. Turning my head, I saw that Katie Jensen had just entered the hall with Rachael, Yvette and a few others. I followed Rachael's trek across the hall with my eyes and blew out a soft breath. "All right guys, I'm gonna go mingle," Leonard announced. John, Michaela and I exchanged knowing looks and John reached over to thump Leonard on the back. Leonard gave him a distracted smile and moved away from us. I told John and Michaela that I was going to the loo and slipped off as well. Michaela was right about me not being the only girl turning up in pants. On the way to the loo, I saw Penny Brooks decked out in a fitting black shirt and pants, purple and black striped arm warmers and a top hat to boot. She looked my way and tipped her hat, to which I gave a tentative smile. I was in and out of the toilet in a few minutes. For some reason, I got a lot more attention than usual. Girls were throwing me covert glances and expectant smiles. The effect was rather unsettling. Not able to spot Michaela and John, I hung around the punch table, hoping that they would turn up soon. Someone sidled up next to me and, after a few futile attempts to get my attention by smiling at me, spoke up. "You were fantastic today on the tracks." I smiled shyly and nodded. "Thanks." Heartened by my response, the girl giggled a little and flipped her hair, all the while gazing at me expectantly. I must have looked really confused because she said, "I really like this song...." Tuning in to the music that was playing, I nodded blankly, all the while wondering where John and Michaela could be. "And I'd really like to dance," the girl said. "Hey Jojo! Come dance with us!" John suddenly appeared beside me. The girl beside me stared at him, looking confused. Then she looked mortified and went away. "What was that?" John asked. I shrugged in ignorance. "I think she thought you were Lenny," Michaela said from nowhere. I looked past John's shoulder and saw her standing there, an amused look painted on her face. "What? Nah...." "Whatevs. Come on, let's dance!" John said, pulling me to the dance floor. I reached a hand out and grabbed Michaela along with us. Doing silly dance moves with John and Michaela on the dance floor turned out to be heaps of fun. I was in the middle of imitating John's crab-like movement when I spotted Rachael standing with her back to the wall not too far from us. My breath caught when her eyes met mine. When she smiled, my heart fluttered. Chalking it up to false bravado, I made my way towards her after shouting 'Toilet!' to my friends. I finally reached where she was standing and came to face her. My heart was leaping all over the place and I hadn't a clue as to what I would say to her now that I was standing in front of her. "Congrats on the medal today," Rachael said, breaking the silence between us. "Thanks. You looked, uh, really, I mean, you were great too, you know, cheerleading." Rachael looked amused at my bumbling but nodded her thanks. Silence settled down over us again. "So, um, how's school?" she asked casually. Her eyes would flicker around us frequently; I felt as though I was sharing her attention with the rest of the hall. "It's okay." "That new girl... Michaela, is it?" Rachael continued after seeing my nod, "How's she like?" "She's great," I said, not sure where we were going with this. "She's not, uh, going out with, any of you, is she?" "Huh?" It took a second for me to understand what Rachael was asking. "Oh, no." Rachael gave me a bright smile. "Good!" I didn't understand why that would be good--or bad, for that matter--but I smiled in reply. "She's very pretty," Rachael commented. "Does she fancy anyone?" "Huh? I don't know. We don't talk about things like that." "Huh. So you haven't taken her on one of your walks?" Now I was truly getting confused. What the hell was this girl on about? "I'm sorry?" I said, at the risk of sounding like an idiot. What walk? "You know, walking through the woods, showing her mushrooms and insects and cool things like that? Like what we did the other night?" "Yea- no- we have gone on walks, if that's what you're asking." "But...?" Rachael prompted me. I looked at her face, trying to gauge what she wanted me to say. "But what?" I was definitely confused. She looked at me decidedly, then shook her head. "Nothing." Just then a giggling Katie Jensen came over and pulled Rachael aside. I was dismissed, I supposed. Rachael shot me a distracted smile and I turned away. Not wanting to remain in the hall, I made my way to the toilet but I didn't go in. Turning a corner, I sat myself on some steps instead. I could still hear the music but the dance seemed so far away from me now. My mind went fleetingly to Leonard and wondered if he was the reason why Katie was giggling. Then I thought about my little conversation with Rachael and my absurd crush on her. Her ease at dismissing me made me feel small and I didn't like that feeling, nor her for making me feel that way. I felt let down by our recent interaction, like a deflated balloon. All that hype that I had associated with Rachael seeped away. And why was she asking all those questions about Michaela anyway? Growing up was way too confusing. "Hey you." Looking up, I saw a concerned looking Michaela. Speak of the devil. "Are you okay? I saw you talking to that cheerleader... and then you disappeared." She smoothed down the seat of her dress and sat down beside me, her knees close to her face. "So? Is everything okay?" "Yea. Everything's fine. I- this is so confusing. I'm not even sure why I'm sitting here. I guess I was just over the loud music. But yea, nothing happened and I'm okay. It's just, sometimes I feel like.... Sometimes I feel too much, you know? For no rhyme or reason. It's crazy." Michaela nodded her head in understanding. "So you like her?" "Huh? What, Rachael?" How did Michaela conclude that from the jumble of words I just let out? Well, she had always been very perceptive, I had to admit. "Yea. I mean, I have a crush on her. She's pretty and..." I searched for more adjectives to describe Rachael and drew up a blank. I really didn't know much about her at all. "She's pretty. And we had this... we were at this meteor shower party coupla months ago and she and I and John ended up taking a walk and, I dunno. I started, you know, noticing her in school...." "Yea, I noticed." I looked at Michaela in surprise. "You noticed?" Michaela nodded. "Do you think I'm a freak?" I asked fearfully. "What? Me? Don't you know me at all by now?" Michaela said, rolling her eyes. Then I realized how silly my question was. Michaela was the one who was open about everything: her brother liking boys, falling in love, having crushes.... "Huh. Yea. Sorry. That was stupid." Michaela acknowledged my apology. "Anyway she was asking a lot about you." "Me?" Now it was Michaela's turn to be surprised. "What did she want to know about me?" "How you're like, if any of us is going out with you, if you've gone walking with me...." I scratched my face. "Weird huh?" "I think she likes you, Jo." "Huh? What?" "She likes you. She wants to know if you and I are going out. If we like each other... that way." "Naaaah." The idea seemed ludicrous to me. Michaela and me? Rachael liking me? Rachael didn't even feel comfortable enough saying hi to me in school! As for me liking Michaela that way, that was just.... I peered at Michaela and noticed not for the first time how good she looked and how good her perfume smelled. Suddenly I felt as though I was right smack in the middle of some ridiculous drama that I had only read about in books. "Whatevs. So you gonna come back in or what?" I allowed myself to be pulled up by Michaela and kept my hand in hers as we walked back towards the hall. She was almost as tall as I was in her heels. And she looked different in that dress with her hair done up and her face made up. She looked all grown up. And beautiful. But she was still Michaela--fun, warm, caring. I stopped in my tracks, my palms suddenly feeling clammy. It felt good to have my hand in Michaela's. The realization made my tummy feel funny. I didn't fully understand what it was that I was feeling, only that I had to act upon it. "What?" she asked, stopping as well. We were along the dim corridor between the toilet and the hall. There were people walking past us and groups of kids hanging out outside the hall. A crazy idea had just popped into my head and was taking control of all my senses. I pulled Michaela towards me and leaned close to her face, as though I wanted to whisper something in her ear. When our eyes met, I think she realized what I was trying to do. "This will change things," she said, almost like a warning. Her words made me stop to think. Our faces still hovered close but nothing touched. Then her gaze fell on my lips and returned to my eyes. I looked at her lips too and swallowed hard, not sure what had happened to lead us to this point in time. This was crazy. We were friends. We worked on the Fortress together. We spent lazy afternoons by the Hole reading. We played Scrabble and teased Leonard about his crush on Katie and laughed at John's initial nervous stuttering each time Michaela spoke to him and.... And then our lips met. My first kiss, in school, shrouded in part darkness, anonymous in the throng of kids walking past, making out, bickering and loitering, all absorbed in themselves and the happenings in their own lives. I felt her tongue slip into my mouth and I touched mine to it briefly. My senses were reeling from the unfamiliar, almost slimy contact, and I hurriedly closed my mouth and opened my eyes. And there she was, looking at me in amusement, her lips curled up in that smile of hers. I let out a shaky breath and smiled, unsure of what to say. "Let's get back before the boys start worrying where we are," Michaela said lightly, as though the past minute of our lives had not occurred. I nodded vehemently, happy to go along with whatever she wanted because I had no mind to think at the moment. It was when we started moving off that I realized that her hand was still in mine and neither of us had thought to relinquish the hold. I spent the night of the dance tossing and turning in my bed. The next morning, Leonard burst into my room and pulled my blanket off me, causing me to grumble loudly in protest. It felt as though I had only just managed to fall asleep when he did that. Michaela and I didn't find Leonard and John until it was time to go. We spent the rest of the dance after our kiss together, talking about random things like we normally would but everything felt different. When eleven o'clock came, all five of us--Angie included--met up in the school carpark and we went our separate ways: Angie, Michaela with John and his father, and Leonard and I with Mum. And now it was daylight. The magic of the night had disappeared and I was very unhappy at being awoken in such a harsh manner. "I kissed Katie!" Leonard crowed. "Mmphbrgg-gimme covers back." I reached out a hand and screwed my eyes shut tightly, hoping to fall back to sleep. "Didn't you hear me? I'm the star! She fancies me! Whoo! We're going on a date! Can you believe it? Katie Jensen is going on a date with me! She doesn't care that I'm younger than her! In fact, the only one who said anything about my age was Jared and I took care of that." I sat up on my bed grumpily when my covers didn't return. My hair was tousled and my face was sleep-lined. Yawning loudly, I managed to peel open an eye. "Good for you. And what do you mean you took care of that?" "Well I told him that if he had a problem with it, to take it outside. And he backed down. That's when Katie said she'd go on a date with me. We're going to the movies tonight!" "Yay..." I said unenthusiastically and plopped back down onto my pillow. "And I can't believe school's out! Three months of nothing to do but fall in love! Yahoo!" "We gotta go to Dad's in a few days," I reminded Leonard. At this, his face darkened. "I dowanna go. I'm going to tell Mum that I wanna stay here." "You know we have to go. We always go to Dad's for a month in summer, no matter how much we don't want to." Leonard and I have had this conversation with Mum many times over the years. And each time we would lose and have to go live with our father for a month up north. We saw him a month every year; it didn't matter that he couldn't see us more because of his work--Dad drove tour buses for nine out of twelve months and was only home for a month at a time. Every time we went up to live with him, we'd spend the first week stepping on egg shells around each other, argue about having to spend time with him, and when we'd finally settle down and stop resenting having to visit him, it would be because we only had a week left. Dad would then be super nice to us and we would feel obliged to be polite to him again and then we'd be off on the plane and he would drop out of our lives again. "This one month disrupts my entire year!" Leonard grumbled. I had to agree with him on that. All that angst in that month didn't feel worth it. We didn't belong in that house that Dad owned. We didn't have a place in his life, and he didn't have a place in ours. "I hate having to tell him everything that happened in my year, like he cares! If he cared, he'd be here. Or nearby at least." "His money helps Mum with the house though." "So that's it? She's renting us to him for a month each year for the money?" "Lenny you know that's not true. And don't let Mum hear you say that." Leonard threw my blanket back at me. "Well thanks for ruining my day." "Wait- Lenny, that's not fair!" I shouted at his retreating back. I heard his defiant 'Whatever!' before he slammed his room door shut and fell back onto my bed. I was wide awake and nothing could make me fall back to sleep now. Then the events of the night before came flooding back to me and I flopped over in bed, running over the memory of my first kiss in my head. I kept at home the entire day, reading--or at least trying to read, staring at the television, and rummaging around the shed, looking for something to hammer or saw. It wasn't until Leonard came past the shed to go out on his date that I realized the entire day had passed just like that. "Bye!" I called out. He waved without a word and tore down the street on his pushbike. I returned my attention to a plank of wood that I had been working on for the past hour and threw my hands up. I wasn't even sure what I was doing with it. Then I frowned and a bulb lit up in my head. I began marking the plank up, trying to put the plan in my head into motion. "Dinner, Jo!" Mum called out from the house. I trudged into the dining room and sat down unceremoniously. "Wanna help get some cutlery?" Mum said, arching her brow at me. I got up with a loud sigh and went into the kitchen. "What's wrong with you, Sullen Face?" "Nothing." "You know, I kinda remember my teenage years and I always thought that I'd be able to communicate with my kids when they become teenagers but," she threw up a hand in the air, "somehow it's not the same when you're going through it. So. I just want you to know that you can tell me everything, anything, nothing. I'd rather you tell me something. And I'll try to be a guiding hand." I stared at my mother from across the dining table. "I kissed Michaela." She rounded her lips but no sound came out. Then she swallowed, nodded, and cleared her throat. "Okay. Okay, that's a start. You kissed Michaela. Good!" We started eating in silence. Then Mum said, "Do you like her? I mean I know you guys are friends and you like hanging out with her, but do you like her... in a special way? Different to liking John, for instance." I thought about it and shrugged. "I dunno." I didn't. "Okay. Well. Have you guys spoken since last night?" I shook my head. "Do you... want to... kiss her again?" I had to give Mum credit for trying. "I dunno Mum. You just said to talk to you, so. That's what happened. I haven't thought about what's going to happen now. I don't even know how I'm feeling." "You guys are just growing up too quickly," Mum said finally with a soft smile. "Guess you'll have to sort that out on your own, kiddo. But if you need a sounding board, well, I'm here." "Cool." When Leonard returned from his date, he kept to himself. I wasn't sure what was going on with him but I was too busy trying to sort out what was going on with myself to care too much. I spent most of my time in the shed, working on my pet project and didn't get to tell him about Michaela and myself; somehow there just never seemed to be a right time for it. In my head though, the scene kept replaying itself. That night, I scribbled her name all over my notebook before I went to bed. I wondered if she was thinking about me the way I was thinking about her and decided to call her the next day. We met at the Hole the day before I was due to leave for Dad's. Michaela was in her usual singlet and shorts and her curls were tied back from her face. I felt funny when I spied her from the distance, and then felt funny for feeling funny; Michaela was no longer just a friend to me. I handed her a bag containing Sam's vest and a haphazardly wrapped up parcel--the result of the plank of wood after many laborious hours. "What's this for?" she asked, accepting it nevertheless. "Thought you might like it," I said with a shrug. "Did you make this?" She had unwrapped the parcel and was touching her fingers to the wooden bookends with a star on each end. It was unfinished. At my nod, her smile widened. "Cool. Thank you. I love it!" Her smile was enough payment for my hard work, not that I was expecting any payment, of course. "I thought that maybe you didn't want to see me anymore after the other night...." she trailed off. "Huh, why would you think that?" I sat myself down next to her, feeling heady with our proximity. Since when did I feel this way about Michaela? The crush I had on Rachael paled in comparison to the kiss I shared with Michaela. Everything was just happening way too quickly for my mind to keep up. "By the way, I thought you might wanna paint the bookends. I, uh, wanted to do it but I'm going to Dad's tomorrow and I wanted you to have it before I go, so..." "I'll have it done by the time you get back. Tomorrow huh? That's quick. Are you looking forward to it? Seeing your Dad?" It was so easy to talk to Michaela. Any initial awkwardness that we might have had dissipated quickly and we fell into the familiar cushion of our friendship. That was when I realized that no matter what happened, we would always have this. We might have only been friends for a few months but everything just felt so easy and real with Michaela. "Did John tell you that he and Angie, um...." I looked uncomprehendingly at Michaela, then widened my eyes. "John and Angie?" I asked incredulously. Michaela started laughing and I joined in with her. "I know! I think it was nothing, though, just something that happened cos we were all in the mood for romance or something. We're young and it's the time to experiment, right?" "I guess." Then I gave her a sideways glance. "So uh, is that what happened between us? An experiment?" I suppose I felt a little relieved at that, but mingling with that sense of relief was a blossoming sadness. "It could be...." she said, returning my look. "Oh come on, Jojo. Did you even like me before, you know, we kissed? I'm the experiment. Or worse still, a substitute for Rachael the pretty cheerleader!" I was even more confused than before but one thing I knew for sure: Michaela wasn't a substitute. "I'm not sure what I felt before... but I definitely feel different now," I said. "I couldn't stop thinking about you the last coupla days." "Really?" I nodded. Then I gave her another sideways look when a new thought popped into my head. "Have you ever, you know, gone out with girls before?" "No, only boys. But I've kissed a few girls," she said. "I know them through Sam," she said by way of explanation. When I didn't say anything, she continued, "Maybe it's a good thing that you're going to your Dad's tomorrow. We'll have some time to think about this and..." "Can I call you?" I blurted out. "I'd be pissed off if you didn't," was her reply. We bumped shoulders and I was happy. The sky was clear, as was the water in the creek. Wrapped in a cool sheet of water, watching Michaela scream as she jumped into the water from the rocks, at that moment, the world felt right. I pointed out a green spotted butterfly and told Michaela how you were considered to be exactly where you should be when you sight a butterfly. She gave me a bemused, indulgent look. I returned her smile. And I was happy. |